A Chance of Breath. A Severus Snape Fanfiction (Stopped)

Chapter 9: Dismal Festivities

The next Morning, Hermione awoke with a pounding headache, and itchy eyes.
Looking around, she noticed a large glass of water, which she drank gratefully​, and a bowl, a towel lying next to it with some fresh clothes. Walking over to it, she was pleased to find it half full with lukewarm water, and was busy cleaning her face, especially her eyes, and getting changed, just as Pomfrey walked into the small surrounding of her bed.
"Nice to see you're up dearie. How do you feel?" The Medi-Witch asked as she began to make Hermione's bed up.
Wiping her face with the towel, Hermione turned and leant against the cabinet.
"Not to bad, just a bit of a headache to be honest." She replied.
"As is to be expected​. Stay here, I'll just get you a Potion and then you can leave. I'll tell Minerva you're awake." She said kindly, smiling at Hermione as she fussed around, before walking back through the partition.
Hermione sighed as she left, and turned back around to stare at the window, feeling pleasently surprised​ to see a thick white blanket covering the ground, and more flakes continuing to fall. She smiled as she thought back to her earlier Christmases in the snow. Snowfights with Fred and George, the three of them against Ron and Harry, long walks with her parents, before going home to hot-chocolate and a black and white movie, or card games. She smiled as a lump formed in her throat at the memories. The blasted war... She sighed, there's nothing she can do now.
She jumped slightly as Pomfrey clattered back through the metal and fabric separation.
"Here you are dear." She said, handing Hermione a small glass bottle, which the young Witch drank gratefully. Smiling as her headache swiftly left her.
"Thank you. I'm feeling much better now. Am I free to go?" She asked. Poppy glanced up at her from pushing the partitions​ to the side.
"Yes dear of course. I don't see why not. But please come back even if you just get another headache." She replied kindly. Hermione nodded and, putting the bottle back on the table, walked out of the room and into the Great Hall. As soon as she was in, she heard a slight screech, and didn't even have time to blink as a flash of red hair blinded her, and strong arms crushed her into a hug.
"Oh Hermione​! I'm so pleased to see you're up! I was so worried." Ginny said quickly, leaning back from the winded Witch and resting her hands on her shoulders​. "What did they do to you?" She asked. Hermione looked at the ground momentarily, before looking back up at her friend other tired eyes.
"I. I don't really want to talk about it Gin. It's over now. I just didn't sleep enough yesterday. That's why it affected me so bad." She replied, leading Ginny to the table, where they both sat.
"Well. I can understand that. And I know you didn't sleep much, you looked so tired. Well, you look a bit better now?" She replied enthusiastically. Hermione looked at her questioningly.
"Urm. Thank you. What's gotten into you?" She asked with a smile. Ginny gave Hermione the biggest grin she had ever seen, and rested her palms on the table.
"Have you seen the weather! There's so much snow! I'M SO EXCITED!" The redhead exclaimed. Causing several students​ to look her way in annoyance. Hermione just laughed in return.
"Yes, I can tell." She said, picking up an apple.
"Our stuff had already been taken home. We just need to apparate after breakfast. So we can walk to Hogsmead first." Ginny said, still smiling. Hermione nodded, and did her best to smile back, but failed miserably. Ginny noticed this, and rested a gentle hand over Hermione's. "Look, I know you're worried about your result. And who, you know. But please, try and enjoy Christmas. We'll have some fun." She said softly, and this time Hermione did manage a small smile in return. But only due to the fact that she was grateful Ginny did not know the true cause of her distress. She bit her tongue as more tears threatened to fall at the memory of the previous night. She was tired of crying. But as she remembered the feeling of euphoria she had experienced, mixed with an overwhelming sadness as he had kissed her. And her utter despair at his words, which rang through her head as if it was her subconscious's heart beat, she felt like crying was all she wanted to do. But it was too late. He was right, they had to live their lives now. Separately.

A few hours later, Ginny and Hermione had just arrived, arm in arm, right in the Weasely's front garden​. Hermione smiled as she watched her best friend, his scar even now clearly evident across his forehead, his black hair flopping around his eyes, run forward and give his fiancée a kiss. As Ginny walked inside, Harry hugged Hermione, and looked at her in concern.
"What's wrong?" He asked.
"Just the examination yesterday. I didn't get much sleep so it didn't work very well with me." She said, attempting a weak smile. Harry narrowed his eyes at her, as if not believing that she had told him everything.
"You've been crying." He stated. And Hermione silently cursed him for his observant nature.
"No." She said, lifting her chin slightly in defiance. "I'm tired Harry." She said, smiling properly this time, hoping to get him off her back. Harry cocked his head to the side and watched her for a short while, before grinning and pulling her into another hug.
"Okay. Come one, let's get you inside." He said brightly, taking Hermione's​ arm in his own and leading her inside, causing the anxious Witch to sigh in a brief moment of relief.
The next few hours passed in jovial spirits​, Mrs Weasely's character that of someone so good, that even Hermione found herself grinning along with the contagious atmosphere. She was hugged more times that she could remember, and began to become tired of the pitiful glances directed at her. No doubt due to Matrimonium Lex. She tried not to let it bother her however, Ginny was right. It was Christmas, or would be in a few days, she would try to have fun.

By the end of the day however, as Hermione laid alone on her put-me-up in the heated attic, she found everything coming back to her. And after tossing and turning for a good few hours, she gave up trying to sleep and headed downstairs, put on her boots and coat, and left for a walk.
She walked the small walk to the lake nearby, and sat on one of the numerous benches. As soon as she did however, she felt herself crumble, and brought her knees to her chest as large tears fell upon her cheeks. Everything that had happened over the past few weeks rested against her as she cried, and remained doing so for a length of time she was unsure of. But probably would have been the whole night, were it not for a hand resting upon her shoulder.
Immediately she jumped up, her wand was drawn, her eyes flicking about in search of danger.
"Hey, hey, calm down. It's only me." His soft voice said, as the moonlight hit his face. Hermione smiled slightly at the sight of Harry, before a new wave of despair fell upon her, and she collapsed back onto the bench, crying harder that she had been before. She was aware of Harry sitting next to her, his arms wrapping themselves around her much thinner than he could remember frame, and his hand gently running itself through her hair. "You're not okay." He stated softly, and Hermione shook her head in response. Harry wrapped his arms around her and just held her as she cried. "I'm not going to ask you to tell me anything. I know you will if you want to. Just know I'm here 'Mione. Whenever you need me to be. And I can keep a secret." He said against her hair. She leant back from him and looked him in the eyes.
"Thank you Harry." She replied, and he smiled in return. A sad smile, before he glared at her.
"Ginny said you've not been eating." He said, and she looked at her hands.
"I just, don't feel hungry. And when I do eat I'm sick half the time." She replied truthfully, playing with her coats belt. "I'm sorry."
"No, Hermione, you don't have to apologise. I would probably feel the same if I were in your position. I couldn't imagine... Well. Just promise me one thing?" He replied, and Hermione looked at him expectantly. "Please try and eat enough to stay healthy. And keep your strength up?" He asked, his green eyes wide and full of concern as he looked down at her curled against him.
"I'll try." She replied. Knowing in her heart that she would try. For him, for all her friends. For Professor Snape. She looked out at the lake and watched the moonlight bounce across the black water, casting flickers of silver across the surrounding trees. A gentle nudge from Harry broke her reverie, and she turned her head to look up at him.
"Come on. You need sleep." He said. Hermione nodded, and with one last look back at the tranquil scene before her, took Harry's arm, and headed back to the house, and her bed.

Christmas passed quicker than Hermione could even register. With the day itself being spent with music, presents, laughter and good food. All prepared, of course, by Mrs Weasely and Ginny. Hermione however, although appreciative of the good humour, couldn't​ find it in herself to be joyful. Thinking of only the one man that, due to his words, which still tormented her, was the only person she wished she could be spending the day with. And every Christmas​ after. She was thankful then, when at the end of the day. She found herself alone outside, curled up and flicking through her Transfiguration book, watching as small snowflakes feel silently around her. She closed her eyes as a sense of calm that she hadn't felt in so long washed over her. She had the Weaselys. She had Harry, and Professor Snape would still be there for her, only not quite in the situation she now longed for. She sighed as she thought about the fact that, in just a few weeks, she would be married, to someone she had probably never met before, and have a deadline set for her to fall pregnant. The pain in her chest, which she had gotten used to over the past four days, flared slightly at the thought, and she gripped the edge of the book she was holding with a force that turned her knuckles white. In just three more days she had to return to Hogwarts. And then, on New Years Eve. On the day of the New Years Ball that Minerva had introduced, for the older years and Teachers, she would discover who she would be spending the rest of her life with. And there was nothing she could do to change it. Whether she liked it or not.