wordswallowed

11

"It appears to me that your serotonin levels are pretty low, which can explain why you have been experiencing anxiousness; besides that, your dopamine levels are low too, which is also an affecting factor towards your mood," The doctor said.

"So, what is it? What is this feeling? I understand that raising these chemical levels require me to do like, exercise and stuff. I've doing all I can to try to keep myself happy - but I just can't help but feel this, stupid ball of emotion, I feel like I...I...I-"

"This feeling is a common problem that we experience not even once, but plenty of times in our lives. It is inevitable almost - as long as you've invested your time, your feelings into it - it's going to happen. There's nothing I'm able to do about it, but I advise you to do plenty of self care-"

"Then can you tell me what my problem is? What is this?"

The man sighed, rubbing his temples, "It's a common diagnosis, it's called _heartbreak_ . "

Heartbreak - I've heard about this word many times before. I've seen it portrayed in countless of romance novels, films, artwork. It happens every day to one of us. Despite how common it is, it has never struck me that I never felt this way before. That is... until today.

They said that when your heart is broken, it would feel like the end of the world. I thought it was a cliché and that there was no such thing as feeling like the world has ended. But as much as I don't want to admit, it's true - as there's no amount of pain has felt so agonising and as awful, I wish people never had to feel this.

But he's right, it's inevitable. We're bound to have our hearts broken. We love someone; invest our time and emotion onto people, giving them the entire world because they deserve it. And then suddenly, it stops, we stop; we stop sending 'good morning' texts, 'i hope you're having a nice day' texts, 'that's funny, i was just thinking of you' texts. We stop laughing at the lamest things - and instead we start arguing about them; 'where were you', 'who is she?', 'you're overreacting', 'hey listen to me'.

Then like a flame, it burns out.

We're left worn out shoes after walking the extra mile for our significant other. We've been stripped down physically, emotionally - we're naked. And suddenly, I don't even know who I am anymore. When you've given everything to a person, you're definitely going to be left with nothing. Every piece of you carried on their backs - but they've decided that you've become a burden, so they just... dump you in the middle of nowhere.

Heartbreak -I've heard about this word many times before. I've seen it portrayed in countless of romance novels, films, artwork. It happens every day to one of us. Despite how much it hurts, how much it drains me - I know for a fact that people recover. They always do. Once you've fallen, you eventually need to get back up. Until that day - here's to nights of lipstick stains, runny mascara, tubs of ice cream and boxes of pizza.

- on heartbreak, a disaster, a celebration
(w.s)