𝘨𝘢𝘮𝘣𝘭𝘦𝘳

Chapter 12. Sight

The elusive mayfly called love. I don't give a shit about that. Who would bother chasing such a dumb thing? That's all Vash ever spoke about. I didn't realize brothers could be so different, yet so equally terrible and irritating.

Knives Millions. I met them both on the same day. Knives seemed calm. He seemed incredibly calm. He was terrifyingly calm when he told Vash and Shana to kill each other. But he was a human hating psycho-killer. Vash couldn't pull that fucking trigger when it mattered, and it cost a lot of people their lives. He's the worst hypocrite there is. I wanted both of these brothers dead, then humans could live peacefully.

Love. That's what Shana gave me. My parents. My friends. Every single one of them is dead. I am destined to hell, there's no way I'll ever see them again.

Love is pain, it's killing. To love someone and to be loved is like double suicide. Someone is bound to get hurt.

There's no time to chase love, or romance, or things like that. I use that time to block out those things, to distract them by trying to be Shana Revy, the cold blooded bounty hunter. I shoot for money, and if you cross me I'll shoot you too. Devoid of love and compassion. But deep down, I was still the hurt little Rebecca Valentine, who couldn't kill if she tried. Yet she wanted revenge, on the brothers who took her life.

I took Shana's name because I wanted to be more like her. To be compassionate, to be loving. She refused to kill, not even her enemies. She was like my sister when I saved her from my parents labs. My parents did not mind, they hid her and me from the government. When they came to kill my parents, she destroyed them with a power I'd never quite seen before. Then we ran from that town, for our lives.

Then my parents were shot down by the town. Shana killed them all that day, and the massacre was on my name. She didn't mean to, she lost control. It was like July, everyone was suddenly gone.

Then she was hired by Knives, she fell deep into darkness. The weight of her guilt showed in her every step. She tried so hard to help people, to save people and it broke her down. It was like Monev, when she chased down Vash. But he didn't show her mercy, he didn't regain his sense of self. If he had first chosen to kill Knives with the first chance, Shana would not have been forced into that controlled trance. Then he shot at her, the wrong person.

So I jumped in front of her and took the bullet. I would have bled to death in a matter of seconds, but she touched me and gave me her life. She gave her life for me, to try to start over with me. For me to be the light, and not fall into darkness like her. But I was bitter. I could not be that kind of person.

That was the day my body stopped aging. Because of her, I was a plant-human hybrid. I did not understand my power, only that I wouldn't be growing anymore. I still don't quite understand.

I don't know. I don't understand what I'm supposed to do. I think that maybe, just maybe if the two brothers, Vash and Knives, were out of this planet I can come to terms with my life. Before Knives started the fall, before Vash took Shana's life. Before Rebecca died. I don't know how to approach it all. I can't understand it. I just can't seem to come to terms with what happened so I turn every corner and meet a dead end. I've betrayed friends over and over again, I shoot them in the back.

Yet Shana told me to be a light. I've seen her again... Vash was just like her, it was almost terrifying. But yet he was like a demon when he shot. Did he regret it? If so... The man who I hunt is really the hero.

Maybe I've made a mistake.

Once coming out of the city like a whimpering fuck-up, I don't even ask Monev questions, standing next to Legato. I shoot him in the head with cold eyes and dead-aim.