KAL4E

Forever and Always

C.

"Wow, really?" I laughed.
"Beat you. Again." He smirked.

We were sitting on the bed playing a game of cards as usual. It was the beginning of spring as we passed winter and it's cold and harsh winds. We looted things together, fought together- we done everything together. He was mine and I was his. We were perfect.

It was a year into the shit storm apocalypse crap. It wasn't as bad as it is now.

His name was Grant. He had brown hair and the most perfect, bright blue eyes I've ever seen. His lips were soft and seeing his smile always made my day. He was perfect- kind, loving and caring.. But always fought like a savage. There was this time where he actually shot an arrow into a zombie's ass, it was funny and it definitely got the Z's attention. It looked pissed. That was one of the good old memories of when we were together.

Anyway, back into the story.

We were playing a game of cards on the bed until we heard rustling in the house.. It was weird considering that we barricaded everything very securely as we were both very paranoid people. It was probably what got us this far. We had a one way in and out system. If we absolutely had to, we'd climb out of the window and onto the roof then we'd jump on to another roof as the houses were built very close. Grant slowly got out his Bowie knife and kept a close eye on the door. I was scared shitless, I had a spear that Grant crafted for me. He was good with the survival stuff, he knew his shit. We both investigated all the rooms on the second floor then stealthily walked down the stairs. The noise was coming from the living room. Grant and I then separated, I was on the left side of the door and he was on the other side, waiting to give me a signal. We both scanned the living room. Nothing. How weird was that? Suddenly, it came running out.

"Jesus fucking Christ!" I screamed, pushing my back against the wall.
Grant was on the floor. The son of a bitch was laughing at me.
It was just a rat. It came running out of the room out of nowhere.

"Well, at least we know what was making that noise." he said, dusting himself off as he was getting up. I rolled my eyes and started walking upstairs and back into the room. I sat on our bed and waited on Grant. I opened the blinds a little to see what the sky looked like outside. The sun was starting to set. As I closed them, Grant walked into the room with a tin of sweet corn and a chunk of deer meat.
"Wanna help me cook dinner?" He asked me, smiling.
"Sure thing." I said, smiling back at him. It was just another day, doing the same things- carrying on with our routine. We both walked downstairs and prepped the kitchen so we could cook. We used a hexamine stove as nothing in the house was really working. Again, Grant's camping stuff and survival skills. He was the one who prepared for this day.

After dinner, we laid down on the bed staring into the ceiling. We were deep into our thoughts. I snapped out of my train of thought and cuddled into Grant who was lying on his back with his hands clasped behind his head.
"I love you so much, you know that?" I continued, "You mean the absolute world to me and if anything was to ever happen, I'd never be able to live with that."
He un-clasped his hands, one stayed behind his head as the other one pulled me closer to his warm body.
"You mean the world to me too," he smiled then kissed my forehead, "Forever and always, right?" He smiled again.

"Forever and always." I replied back, kissing him softly.
We talked about random things such as life- the earth, planets and all sorts of random things before I fell asleep in his arms.

I woke up to the sun shining into my eyes. The blinds were open.
"I'm pretty sure I shut them last night.." I thought to myself. I brushed it off quickly and turned to my left side.

Grant was gone.
I panicked and put on my gear then ran downstairs. Everything was locked. I looked in every room apart from the kitchen and dining room.
He was no where. Shaking in fear and paranoia, I finally walked into the kitchen and looked for him. I called out his name. No answer. At this point, I was really scared.
"Where could he possibly be?" I thought to myself, crying. Then I saw a note on the table. How could I have possibly missed that?

The note read:

"I'm going out scavenging without you today, thought I might let you sleep in a little since we stayed up a bit late last night. I love you. You're the best. Ever."

It was sweet but waking up and panicking two minutes later isn't. I grabbed the spear then went out and looked for him. I can't have him going out on his own, he could be hurt somewhere. The places we would scavenge were nearby so I went there but.. No sign of him. Maybe he went out hunting? I don't know. I walked to the forestry part of the area and called out his name. No answer.
"Grant?" I called out again.
"Gra-"
Something grabbed me and pushed me onto the ground. What I seen wasn't as scary as losing Grant though. It was a zombie.
I pulled its legs making it fall onto its back then smashed my foot into its chest and speared it in the head.
"You're not Grant, you imposter." I spat out, wiping sweat from my forehead. I continued on to find him. I was not going to give up.

An hour into the search, I started feeling tired. My legs grew weak and I was hungry. All of a sudden, I seen tracks. It wasn't an animal's tracks. It was Grant's. I could tell by the prints that his boots left. I followed them, excitedly. I was still very aware of my surroundings.

Blood trails.
Blood. Fucking. Trails.

This could either be good or bad.
Good because he hunted an animal down.
Bad.. He could be dead. Let's hope for the best.
I kept following them, I was still aware of my surroundings. This got my anxiety up. It got bad but I needed to be strong enough for both of us because there is no way that I am leaving him. I can't.

I finally stumbled upon something that I never ever wanted to see.

A pool of blood.
Grant's belongings.
No sign of Grant.

My heart dropped down to earth's core. What the hell happened? What do I do now? He can't be gone.. He just.. He can't be. I took his belongings and went back to the house. Is it over for me..? No. I must survive. For him. I don't know if I can move on..

I finally reach the house and barricade everything securely like I would normally do. I headed straight upstairs and closed the room door. I sat on the bed and put the bag down on the ground.
"Is this.. Maybe this should be over for me." I thought to myself.
"I can't do this alone.. I just can't."
I reached into Grant's bag and got out his Bowie knife then held it to my neck.
"Are you sure you want to do this?"
"C'mon, after all you have been through and you're just giving up?"

So many thoughts raced through my mind. I started crying, struggling to breathe. I threw the knife across the room, leaving a small hole in the wall.
"Fuck." I cried.
"Fuck!" I screamed, getting up and kicking the wardrobe.
I wasn't thinking right. I couldn't break myself down like this. Grant was gone and I had to go on without him. He was long gone. His body wasn't even there. I can't stay here.

I gathered myself together and put the Bowie knife back in the sheath and put it in my bag. It was something that I would never ever lose. I'd keep it for as long as I would live. I went into the wardrobe and got out a t-shirt of Grant's. It was plain and burgundy. It had a small pocket at the right side on the chest area. I put it on, I had the knife in my bag. It was time to move on. I need to be strong.

I barricaded the door and windows. I didn't want anyone going in at all because that was Grant's home. I've lived there for a few years. Half of my things were still in there. Makeup, stuffed animals, pillows- everything. Memories. I left all of it behind. It was time to have a fresh start- a fresh start but with Grant on my mind 24/7 even though he wasn't with me.

I left the place that I felt safe in, forever.

Goodbye, past.
Hello, present.