secret feelings

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"Omg! Omg! He is so hot," Angie screamed on top of her lungs while pointing at some hotshot player.

Van just rolled her eyes at her friend since her friend screams for anyone who has abs anyway. Yes, times like this is definitely not foreign to her.

It was their intramurals and the basketball boys category B finals was just starting. It was between the blue and yellow team. Flaglettes were raised here and there: yellow, red, blue, and green. The bleachers turned into a sea of colors and the whole gymnasium was jam-packed with people. Everyone was energetic in cheering for their own teams and the girls were frenzied by the thought of seeing their crushes show off their skills.

For Van, all the basketball players were all the same, they were all amateurs. Except for one. The golden boy who she was crushing on for a very long time was the center of attraction. It was not just because of his good looks, it was because of his playing skills and evident charisma. How she wished that he would glance her way even just for a while.

"Don't tell me you're daydreaming again," Angie sat next to her before nudging her elbow.

Van actually find her bestfriend bipolar. One moment, she is this ultimate fangirl and the next, she becomes a teasing or a serious friend. Either way, Van still loves her because that's what makes Angie unique. She can tell her absolutely anything without expecting her to be judgemental. So, Angie knows everything about Van, even about her first love.

"Could you please lower your voice? I don't want the entire school to know my secret," Van said while pacing from left to right to ensure that no one heard her friend.

"Pft. It's not like they're going to be shocked to find out that you're crushing on him anyway. They'll probably just think that you're an addition to his long list of admirers." Angie said dismissively while waving her hand in front of her.

That's absolutely not true. I have known him all my life and I know that this thing I'm feeling right now is not just admiration, it is love. Van thought quietly to herself.

Of course, Angie knew that Van was indeed in love with Mark. The way that her bestfriend cried while talking about him clearly says it all. She just teases Van about it in order to lighten the mood and not to give her any false hope. Sure, she wants Van to be with Mark in order to make her friend happy, but giving her friend a false sense of security is not the best way to support her.

Known to all, Van and Mark had been classmates since the 1st grade until their 3rd year in high school. Because of this, she likes to think that she had en edge compared to the other girls crushing on him. She takes pride the most in having to see him cry and taking care of him when he got sick. But after all these years, it seems that Mark doesn't return her feelings. Nevertheless, she still kept on hoping that a day will come when he would say he likes her too. For now, she just wants to wait patiently. After all, good things happen to those who wait.

Suddenly, gasps were heard from the crowd. Curiously, Van glanced around and felt as if someone punched her when she saw Mark sitting on the ground, a pained expression on his face while he was holding his ankle. Out of instinct, Van rushed into the crowd, wanting to comfort him. Before she could make a fool out of herself, Angie stopped her halfway.

"Are you crazy? People will start being suspicious if you do that!" Angie said angrily.

As if caught on a trance, Van blinked several times and cursed herself for being so weak and foolish. She slammed her forehead and quietly followed Angie back to their seats.

"Sorry," Van mumbled. Tears were starting to form in her eyes, but she forced herself not to let them fall.

Feeling pity for her friend, Angie put her arm around her friend's shoulders.

"I understand. Jeez, you really are an amazing person, Van. The guy you like doesn't even seem to care, but you still like him anyway," Angie said, tears already forming in her eyes too.

Deep inside Angie, she idolizes her friend for her wisdom. Van really likes the guy, loves him even, but she was just waiting for him to return her affection. She isn't like other girls who make the first move and make a fool out of themselves. She is even willing to let him if that will make him happy.

********

As expected, the yellow team, which wad Van and Angie's team, became victorious. Among the 4 teams, their team was the one who had most of the athletic students. They were the champion on all the major games and had only 3 silvers each for the junior and minor games.

Also, Mark, who was their teammate, was declared the MVP for basketball.

As usual, many girls, even boys, cheered for him as he went on up the stage. How Van wished that she could be that girl whom he will share his achievements with.

Angie became the MVP for chess while Van did not win any special awards due to her lack of athletic skills.

While Mark was on stage accepting his reward, Van's eyes were fixed on him. She was staring intently at the boy who first made her fall in love. The only guy who can manage to make her sweat and make her heart beat so fast by just glancing her way. She sighed. Just as she wanted him to be hers, she did not want to force him to like her. If they were meant to be together, fate will surely make a way to let it happen. For now, she will just be contented to watch him from the sidelines.

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