Fragmented (A ThirBea Story)

✧ 1 ✧

/Thirdy/

Three more days until the annual Ateneo Bonfire, I remind myself. Three more days until I see her once again after their finals loss. Three more days until I get to have a chance to be with her again - in private, I hope.

I don't know why that thought suddenly crossed my mind as I was walking towards the holding room before our interview here in ABS-CBN. She pops into my mind at the most random times, and I feel like that is what makes her special. She can make me feel all sorts of emotions without being near me.

As I entered the room, my mom greeted me with a smile.

"Oh, Kuya! You're here na pala. Fans are looking for you in Mama Larz's instagram live," mom exclaimed. I smiled, kissed her cheek and went to sit beside Mama Larz.

"Hinahamon niya si Thirdy mag-golf. Sabi ni Bea ugly daw swing niya... okay?" Mama Larz confusingly said.

"Mas ugly swing 'nun," I replied with a shy smile. I guess I still can't control my being 'kilig' whenever she's mentioned.

The golf topic led to Manong talking about Bea's dad and his membership in a golf course. Hearing him talk about playing golf with Tito Elmer actually got me quite interested. I can't believe Manong just mentioned this to me now!

I chuckled as the thought of Bea comes into my mind once again. Oh Isabel, you just seem to follow me everywhere I go. I feel like everything is all about you. Truth is, I see you in everything I do. You seem to be related to all the things that are dear to me. You are very close to my heart, Bea. There's just one thing holding me back...

I shook my head multiple times as the last part I thought of brought me back to reality. Billie. Yes, my girlfriend. The only thing holding me back from being with Bea. I don't even know how I got myself in this relationship, to be honest. It was just a couple of friendly dates, and I guess 'feelings' took over.

I love Billie, I really do. But I guess being with her for about a year now made me realize that maybe this was just a best friend kind of love.

What I feel for her is waaay different from what I feel with Bea. She doesn't make my heart flutter or make my stomach do cartwheels unlike Bea does. I would always compare the things she does to the things Bea would do if they were in the same situation.

It seems like I would always look for more even if I appreciate all of her efforts. But all this time, maybe I was just looking for Bea. Maybe my heart was just longing and looking for her. Corny, I know; but that's just what I am when it comes to Bea. I can't help but feel giddy when she's around.

I'm pretty sure the time will come when Billie and I would break up. I guess our Bea-Thirdy love story was the right love at the wrong time. However, I know we will have our time. We will have it eventually. I just hope destiny will be on our side, and everything will fall into place. And maybe, just maybe, I will be home.

✺✺✺

I let myself crash on my bed, for I was finally done for the day. I felt pretty fine since there was no training naman today. Papers and finals week preparations drained me though. I was about to switch my lamp on my bedside table off when I saw a notification pop on my phone.

Twitter: Direct Message
@_beadel: I checked my notifs awhile ago and some fans were making sumbong that you said mas ugly daw swing ko? Nako Thirds ah, are you challenging me?! 😠
11:09

The biggest smile appeared on my face as I read her DM. I laughed as I typed my reply.

@ThirdyRavenaaa: Oh ba't parang you're mad? True naman yun ah? No need to challenge you, Beatriz. I'm obviously better. Hahaha! 😂
11:11

@_beadel: Assuming mo naman.. you're not good naman eh! Baka you're just playing golf to make other girls notice you 🤔 For pogi points purposes lang naman pala... hay.
11:13

@ThirdyRavenaaa: Nako, you're being your 4ever h8er self nanaman. I guess this calls for a golf date, then? Manong and Tito Elmer as the judges? 😛
11:16

@_beadel: G it! Can't wait to beat you, Ferdinand!!!
11:18

@ThirdyRavenaaa: Still your usual kulit and competitive self, I see. Goodnight, Beatriz. Sleep well!
11:19

She's always the cutest when she bullies me. She can bully me all day, and I wouldn't even mind at all. I will always love Bea's playful side. It makes me grateful to have her in my life. It's like she leaves rainbows and unicorns wherever she goes. Agh, corny ko naman masyado. I swear this is what Bea does to me! Time to sleep, Thirds; I thought to myself. And with a smile on my face, I doze off to sleep. What a great way to end this tiring day.