Go {Harry Styles}

Chapter 2

"Thanks for leaving the car for me. Surprised I didn't get pulled over on my drive back." Jill grumbles as she walks into the kitchen. She scratches her head and groans. Since she is hung over, I pass the Aspirin to her. She tries giving me a grateful smile, but it turns into a grimace. I don't blame her since I also have the same pounding feeling in my head. "We should totally go again tonight." Jill says. I raise my eyebrows at her. She's moping around because she's got this massive hang over, and she's suggesting we go again? I don't understand her thinking. It is simply illogical.

"Um, no. How about we just hang around the house? I really wanna hang out with Niall." I whine. Niall is my boyfriend. He sings in a band and is totally the indie-rock type. He makes me whole and complete. I haven't hung out with him the whole week. And it was either because I was hanging out with Jill or doing a photo shoot.

"Ew, I forgot you were a taken lady." Jill says to me, rolling her eyes.

"I thought you liked Niall, Jill! If you didn't like him, why didn't you tell me?" I ask her with a pout.

"I do like him! It's just I feel like he's taking my best friend away from me." she tells me, also pouting. I roll my eyes.

"Jill, I've hung out with you all week and not him," I say to her. "Besides you wanted to go clubbing again. Just grab some hipper, cooler friends to go clubbing with. Just like you always do."

"Seriously? I can't believe you! I just wanted to hang out with you, but yet you manage to become jealous?! I don't understand you, Becca. I just don't." Jill exclaims.

"Jesus, Jill! I just suggested that you go clubbing! I'm sorry if I came off jealous!" I exclaim. The pounding in my head intensifies and so does the silence in the room. I roll my eyes. "I'm going to my room. My head hurts." I say to her and storm into my room.

When I reach my room, I jump on my bed. Jill tires me out, yet at the same time she's my rock. She keeps me sane and alive. And she was there through high school, breakups, etc. I just can't let go of my best friend like that. I can't.

But I also don't like the choices Jill has been making. She has to make a fight out of everything, too. Why? I don't know. I honestly don't know.

I need fresh air.

I clamber off my bed and stumble to my closet. I put on a pair of distressed shorts, a light pink muscle tank, and my pink Sperries. I comb my hair and then put it into a fishtail brain. I place a white snapback on my head. Then, I apply my makeup. I use black eyeliner and sparkling pink eye shadow with mascara.

I glance at the time on my phone.

11:49 AM

I grab my keys and bag then head out the door. I climb into the driver's seat and start the car. I smile as I think of a place to go.

•

"Hi, I would like to order a cherry lime soda?" I say into one of our local Sonic intercom things. The lady tells me what the price would be and stuff. Soon, I'm sitting in my car sipping out of my soda with nothing to do. I could call Jill and say, "Hey I'm so sorry even though I did nothing wrong! I just wanted to hang out with my boyfriend who I haven't seen all week omg I am so mean please forgive me?!"

Or I could go to Target and shop.

I think I'll take the latter choice.

I drive off to Target and for once do not feel like the model that I am. I feel like a normal twenty-one year old who is madly in love with Target. Like I don't have to worry about what I eat or what I do. I don't have to worry about making smart choices. I feel free. Alive, almost.

I walk into Target with pride. I shop in the women's section and the food section. In the food section I grab tubs of ice cream, whipped cream, toppings, and chocolate sauce. I also grab several bags of chips and five liters of Mountain Dew. I check out and walk out of store.

Tonight, I plan to have a huge hang out at my place with my other friends. And when I say other friends, I mean my friends other than Jill and her gang. I text everyone to meet me at my house at 5:00 for a movie marathon, including Harry from last night.

I feel like I owe him after last night. I am surprised I remember anything from last night, actually. I was so drunk that I was kissing random guys. And I have a boyfriend. Holy shit. I didn't think of that until just now.

I cheated on Niall last night. What am I going to do? I can't lice with the guilt. Well fuck. When I reach our driveway, I honk my horn in anger and groan. I bring my bags inside and see Jill sitting at the counter.

"What's all that stuff?" she says while ruffling her curly hair.

"I am going to have a hangout tonight." I reply smoothly.

"Oh, too bad. I am going Mollie's tonight so I won't be able to hang around." Jill says.

"Too bad,"

"Why do we always do this?"

"Do what?"

"We act like nothing is wrong. I act like nothing happened. You act irritated." Jill says. "I don't get it."

I shrug. I don't know what to say. We do act like nothing happened. Bur alot has happened. I finally come up with a response.

"I think I need a break." I tell her. Her eyebrows furrow. "I need a break from this. It's not healthy for me or for you, Jill! Every single morning and night we fight! You start fights out of nowhere and make me seem like the bad guy! But you're the one stumbling around like a druggie! In fact, I wouldn't be surprised if you were on drugs! I am going to start looking for my own place tomorrow. When you feel like you have your shit together, maybe we can be friends again. I just need a break from this.

"I'm sorry I'm not perfect, Rebecca! You're a model! You're formed to be perfect. You have to be perfect! You fucking crave it! It's sickening, to be honest! Don't you realize it? Everything you do is based around how perfect it is." Jill yells.

"I was actually having a good day after our fight, and now you're ruining it again. I can't deal with this right now." I say to her and return to unpacking the bags from Target. Jillian groans and grabs the keys angrily and storms out of the house, slamming the door behind her.

I can't handle fighting with her. It is not healthy for either of us. We ruin each other. It's sad, really.

It's sad what two people can do to each other