Midnight​ Musings

The Conversation We Never Had

We meet up at the cafe on the corner of Eagle St. & Pioneer Way just like old times. I approach the quaint shop and see you sitting outside at a table. I see you before you see me. You sip your latte and survey the town square.

The laughter of children fills the air as they run around playing in the crisp autumn breeze. Parents snap photos in an attempt to capture the dwindling moments of their childhood; knowing that they are growing up just like weeds: too fast. A group of teenagers in skinny jeans and hoodies heads into the bookshop across the square (no doubt preparing for their next AP English book report). An elderly couple sits on a bench in front of the old courthouse seeming content to be arm and arm in silence.

You look down at your phone, and scan the square again before locking eyes with me. A look of recognition flashes in your eyes, and you give me that famous lopsided grin that I have missed so much. A magnetic force brings us together until we are standing in front of each other, unable to remember ever walking towards the other.

I look into your eyes, and my breath gets caught in my throat. The tide of your sea blue orbs had a tendency to draw me in; my thoughts giving into their ebb and flow. Looking into your eyes I saw a small shadow of the boy that I used to know. The one who would serenade me with Stairway to Heaven on his acoustic guitar. The one who winked at me from across the stage as I played my violin solo, and was the first person to congratulate me after the concert. The one who I would talk to about everything until the sun came up, and who would walk me to school the next day. That boy was gone, and in his place stood this man who I recognized only through slivers of his past. I felt a soft sigh fall from my lips in reverence to that boy as my hand reached up to stroke your golden locks.

We stand there staring at each other, our eyes taking stock of the familiar details that lie on the surface, and the new ones waiting to be discovered. Your hands automatically reach towards my hips like they belong there. I see your smile reach your eyes, making your face light up like the sun. You're the first one to break us out of our trance.

"Hi," your rich baritone voice fills my ears like a symphonic delight. I had almost forgotten just how much I missed hearing it until this moment.

"Hey." I can't contain the smile that washes over my face from looking at yours.

I wrap my arms around your neck as yours circle around my waist, making me feel secure in your embrace. My cheek rests against your sternum as I involuntarily breathe in your scent. The masculine smell of leather, vetiver, and crisp air fills my nostrils as I savor your essence. You reach up to cup the back of my head, your lips brushing against my forehead. Your chest vibrates as you gently whisper something under your breathe. The gentle breeze catches your words and carries them away.

We sit and talk about everything that our lives have become, and how different being an adult is from the movies. We talk about our mothers, philosophy, and music. Secret smiles, laughter and sarcasm are exchanged in abundance as is our style. You tell me about your most recent relationship, and I tell you about my studies and work. Our conversation flows easily from one topic to the next, needing no coercement.

Hours pass like minutes, and we find ourselves strolling around the square as the sunsets. You tell me how your brother started a band that's playing at the local bar on Saturday, and I tell you that I'll try to make the show. Somehow we wind up next to my car, sensing that our time is coming to a close. We stand there memorizing each other's features, taking in the moment.

You step closer until our noses are almost touching. I feel your warm rough hands slide down my shoulders and past my arms, until they land on my waist. Without warning you suddenly reveal another hidden gem inside yourself.

"I fell in love with your spirit," you said, your eyes never leaving mine.

"I fell in love with what was in here," I said as I placed my fingertips on your temple, "and here." I slid my hand down until it rested against your chest, just above your heart.

Your lips lightly press against my forehead, but it's not enough. I let out a sigh as your forehead rests against mine. Our lips brush together slightly, and electricity runs through my stomach. In a split second time stands still. I slow my breathing as I decide to stop thinking, and go with what comes naturally. I close the distance remaining between us and kiss you. I see fireworks behind my eyelids, as your lips mold to mine. You groan and bite my lip, your tongue dancing along the seams of my lips. An involuntary moan escapes me, and you take full advantage of the moment. Your tongue dances with mine as your fingers dig into my hips, branding me in a way that reaches my soul.

This is more than desire.

It's more than a moment or a feeling.

This is a calling.

It's two souls being intertwined by something more powerful than fate or destiny.

This is love.

A love that stands the test of time, and stays true.

No matter how far we go, what we see, or how we grow, we'll always have this.

We'll always have us.