The Tragedy of Us

Chapter 1: End of the End

As soon as the elevator doors opened, I did what I do best.

I ran.

I ran and ran and ran.

I dont know where Im going and right now, it doesn't even matter. All I know is that I want to get as far away from here as possible. I need to. 

I made my way through the sea of people. Tinutulak ko ang lahat ng humarahang sa daan ko hanggan sa makalabas na ako ng hotel ng tuluyan.

Air. I need air.

Mabagal akong naglakad papalapit sa pinakamalapit na punong nakita ko. Kumapit ako doon at pumikit nang mariin. Huminga ako nang malalim at nang paulit ulit. 

"Kathryn?" Agad akong napadilat at nilingon ang pinanggalingan ng boses. "Kathryn Bernardo?" Kumunot ang noo niya.

My eyes grew wide and I immediately stood up straight. I combed my hair using my fingers and straightened out my dress. "Hi Cassey," I smiled.

Nawala ang kunot sa noo niya. Nag-aalinlangan siyang ngumiti. "Hi," she looked around, "anong ginagawa mo dito?"

"Oh." My smile slowly faded. Well, that was blatant. I tried my hardest not to roll my eyes. 

"I didn't mean it that way!" She quickly defended. "What I meant was... uhm... what... why are you... here?"

I smiled understandingly. "Actually, I was just leaving."

She opened her mouth to say something but I quickly turned around, not even waiting for her response. I walked back into the hotel lobby, avoiding the curious stares thrown at me. Dumiretso ako sa elevator at pinindot ang parking. 

Pagkasakay ko ng kotse ay agad ko itong pinaandar. I drove faster than my usual speed. I just need to get away. Nang matapat ako sa red light ay inabot ko ang cellphone ko at dinial si Hannah. She answered on the fifth ring.

"Fuck you," bungad niya.

I giggled. "It's already 2pm." I rolled my eyes even if she can't see.

"Yeah, well, kakagising ko pa lang."

"About that," I sighed. "Do you mind opening up early for me?"

"The hell, Kathryn?" She groaned.

Nag green ang ilaw. I resumed driving. One hand on the steering wheel, the other still holding my phone.

"What the heck is wrong this time?" She murmured. Hula ko ay hanggan ngayon, nakapikit pa rin siya at nakahiga sa kama.

"I need a drink... or two or three or four! I need to forget!" I laughed.

"Wtf, Kath?" Her voice very much awake compared to earlier. "What's happening?"

Her voice echoed in my ears. Her questioning repeated multiple times.

I poured my heart out to a guy who only turned me away. I am heartbroken. The love of my life is marrying the love of his life in a few hours. Im finally paying for my biggest mistake on full blast today. That's what's happening.

Hindi ko namalayan na tumulo na pala ang mga luha ko.

"Please." My voice cracked.

Hannah sighed. "Im on my way." And I hung up.

Di nagtagal ay nakarating na ako sa bar na pagmamay-ari ni Hannah pero dahil wala pa siya, nagpark muna ako sa tapat. Sinandal ko ang noo ko sa manibela. I closed my eyes and next thing I knew, tears were everywhere. The tears erupted into sobs and the sobs turned into yelling and I couldn't stop it.

Kasalanan mo 'to, Kathryn. You did this to yourself. There's no one else to blame but you.

Suddenly, there were loud knocks on my window. Nilingon ko iyon at bumungad sa akin ang nag-aalalang mukha ni Hannah. I quickly pulled out the key from the ignition and opened the door.

"Kath--" 

I collapsed into Hannah's arms and she quickly caught me. I buried my face in her neck. 

Hinagod niya ang likod ko. "What's wrong?" Bulong niya. 

Umiling ako at lalong humigpit ang yakap sa kanya. She sighed. "Let's go in."

Inalalayan niya ako papasok at pinaupo. Nilock niya muli ang pinto at kinuha ako ng tubig. 

"Okay," umupo siya sa tapat ko. "What the fuck is happening?"

I wiped my tears and looked away. Hinawakan ko ang baso ng tubig at pinaikot-ikot ito.

"Is this about Daniel?" Mahinang tanong niya.

Agad na bumalik ang tingin ko sa kanya. Naramdaman kong muling nag-init ang gilid ng aking mga mata. I gulped.

"We've been friends for months... you never talk about him."

A tear fell and I quickly wiped it away. "I don't know where to start," bulong ko.

She smiled and held my hand. "Start from the beginning."

And so I did.