Funny or die

Teenage post#1

I don't know whats more awkward, answering Dora, or sitting in silence while she stares at you?

I wish I had a cute laugh or one o those laughs that make other people laugh but I sound like a hyperventilating walrus with asthma.

Saying "Oh yeah I get it" just so the teacher walks away.

That awkward moment when your acting very weird in front of your crush.

I dont understand how some people can remember things they did when they were 6 when I cant even remember what I had for breakfast.

That awkward moment when you see twins fighting and one of them calls the other ugly.

That awkward moment when you open the bathroom door and someone is already there.

That awkward moment when you're taking a bite of pizza and you accidentally bite the whole entire layer of cheese off.

I wish mosquitoes sucked the fat instead of blood.

When am alone, I think of so many things to say to you, but when I have the chance to tell you, I go speechless.

Simon says jump! Very good! But simon didn't say land, so you're all out.

Dear teacher.
I talk to everyone. So moving my seat won't help.
Sincerely students

We all have that one Teacher who's like "Don't pack up yet. There's still 11 seconds of class left... "

DEAR HATERS, I COULDN'T HELP BUT NOTICE THAT 'awesome' ends with "me" and 'ugly ' starts with"u".

OK, am getting out of bed in 10 seconds.
1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 9, 9,...

Looking at you text books and thinking "What waste of a tree"

The longest five seconds in anyone's life is waiting to press the "Skip Ad" button on YouTube.

I hate how Monday far away from Friday and Friday is so close to Monday.

Charging your phone 5 minutes before you leave, because you think it will make a difference.

PE doesn't stand for physical education. It stands for public embarrassment.

I remember when my best friend was shy and quiet, I created a monster.

That awkward moment when you're actually pulling a push door.

When a boy gets jealous it's kinda cute but when a girl gets jealous world war 111 is about to start.

How I end a class presentation:
"So.... Um.... Yeah..... "

Mom:" why is everything on the floor!?"
Me: "gravity mom."

I like food and sleep. If I give you my food or text you all night, you're special to me.

Some people's laugh is better than the joke.

Mom: What did you learn at school today sweetie?
Me: Obviously not enough. I have to go back tomorrow.

I'm not lazy, I'm just highly motivated not to do anything.

I've always wanted to turn in a big chair and say "I've been expecting you. "

I hate when am listening to music really loud and I have to keep pausing it because I constantly think am hearing my name being called.

A/N

Hi everyone, am new on Wattpad. I hope you like this book and if there is any complaint let me know.
Thanks.

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