Eloise - the secret behind the mask

Chapter 7

I do not know how long I was running for, only that I stopped when I ran out of breath and I felt dizzy.
     I glanced around and did not recognise where I was immediately.
     It was not familiar to me, and yet in some way I felt quite at home.
     I sat on the kerb, caught my breath and reflected on what had happened.
     It was only then that I felt stupid.
     I started to cry. This time with the knowledge that I had lost my dreams and hopes for a better future.
     I still did not understand what Lukas meant to me, however, I knew that whatever I had felt about him was false.
     He was a client, just like all the others, except for the balaclava.
     And I had let myself get carried away by a man.  This was a mistake that must never happen again.
     I took the brave decsion to go back and say sorry to Caroline.  I had behaved like an ungrateful child, and I had treated her like the person I cared least about in the world.
     I waited for a moment more before standing up because my head was still spinning. I took the opportunity to look around me again.
     I thought I had to be in a wealthy area.  The houses were palatial and well cared for.  There was no rubbish on the streets, and everything looked perfectly neat.
     There were very few parked cars in this road, probably because most of the people who lived here kept their vehicles in garages.
     I spotted a white BMW, although I could not tell you exactly which model it was. A bit ahead

there was a Golf Gti and at the end of the road I thought I could see a Q7.
     With these sort of cars the people living in this area had to be well off.
     After I had studied the area around me as well as I could I stood up and headed towards the little fountain nearby, and I soon realised that the only noise in this zone was the sound of water cascading.
     I was pleasantly surprised and I knelt down to drink, but I stopped when I noticed a very bright light behind me.
     I turned and saw two car headlights shining right at me, almost blinding me and making me unable to see the car they belonged to.
     I shielded my eyes, and raised my arm as I did so.  The car headlights turned off.
     It was Lukas, or rather, it was his car.
     Despite the fact that my head had started to spin like crazy, I decided to not give his presence too much weight and I continued to drink.
     The car moved forward until I was walking alongside the passenger door and I heard the familiar sound I remembered so well, click.
     I stood still where I was.  I decided not to let myself get carried away again by my emotions, however, it only took a few seconds for me to realise this would be difficult.
     The driver wound down the window nearest me and in a kind tone said, "come on, get in."
     I felt breathless, I wanted to get in.  I wanted it with all my heart, but my mind told me not to do it:  I had to go back to Caroline, I had to say sorry, I had to get away from this emotional mess, and I had to find clarity within myself.
     And yet in a moment of lack of willpower my hand drew closer to the car door, opened it and I got in the vehicle.
     Lukas still had his face covered.  A sigh of disapproval came out of mouth unexpectedly.

     I felt my legs shake and I leant on my bag, hoping that the man ould not see my state of mind, and as soon as I realised that the bag did not really hide my problem much, I put my hands on my knees, hoping to keep them still without drawing attention to myself.
     I looked at him and in an abrupt manner I said, "I'm not working."
     My voice came out shrill and broken, as if I were frightened of starting a conversation with him,  " I thought so, it doesn't matter."
     I did not know if he was disappointed or what, however, I was certain that at that moment he was going to ask me to get out of his car, or more likely, he would have insisted I got out, instead he looked straight ahead at the road, put the key in the ignition and said, "so what are you doing here?"
     I was surprised by that unusual question asked so sincerely, perhaps maybe too sincerely.
     "I needed to be alone, to think, to understand what's happening to me. So I took a couple of hours rest, and when I started running I reached this place."
     I saw him stare at my hand with a certain amount of curiosity.  It was only then I realised I was still holding my boots.
     I was bare footed, and I had not even realised it.  I put my boots back on quickly. I felt embarrassed and  awkward.
     I returned to looking at my hands. He calmly said, "you could have kept them off, those trampolines can't br very comfortable."
     I could feel my cheeks going red and my thoughts rebel.
     "No they're not comfortable, you ugly turd, they disgust me.  I don't wear then for me, I wear them for you disgusting pigs who don't pay me unless I've turned you on," I thought all of this but I did not say it because I did not have the courage to say it.
      I was angry, absoliutely furious because I did not understand what was happening to me.  What