- Lesbehonest. h.e.s -

- 12. For your eyes only. -

           .... 2 weeks later

    I stare at the ceiling, holding on to a childhood photo of me and Kim. Our eyes bright and smiles big.

The funeral was yesterday. Mom went and I couldn't speak to her. She followed me to my car but I drove off, knowing I couldn't and wouldn't forgive her any time soon. I didn't tell anyone about it. I didn't want anyone's sympathy.

A knock was heard at the door but I stayed paralyzed, in and out. I hadn't cried since Kim passed. It never really hit me. I just stayed away from socializing and since Nat had left to see her family the same day I did and thought I was still with mine, it wasn't very hard.

Another knock rung through my flat, making a low groan leave my mouth from irritation. My phone began to ring, echoing, as I rolled over to look at who was calling with no intention of actually picking up. "banana boy" labeled the call.

"You know I can hear the phone ringing, right?" Was shouted from behind the door as my face stayed deadpanned and I rolled back over.

"I know you're in there, Samira." Silence filled the flat. After about 15 minutes of Harry asking me if I needed to talk, I hear him sigh in defeat. But before I hear his footsteps, paper is slid under the door.

I get up an hour later, to get food, of course, and accidentally step on the envelope I had forgotten about and pick it up. Harry's messy handwriting saying :

Hello beautiful. I have a show tonight. My first solo show in front of a big crowd and i'm a nervous wreck. it would definitely calm my nerves if you attended love. Address and time on the back. And an extra ticket in envelope.

p.s , I know you need space but that can't stop me from wanting and missing you.

p.s.s , i miss your cute booty

here whenever you need me,
all the love in my heart,
H. xx

What a dork.

I read Harry's letter about 10 times before finally deciding to go. But I'm not going as Sammie or Sam, I'm going as Samira. Today, I'm letting out my feminine side.

This could either end up really bad or really bad.

After taking a well needed shower, I go to Nat's closet, ready to switch it up. I open her closet finding bright ass pastel and neon colors flooding it. I gag a little. I've been a fan of too much color. I dig and dig through her shit until I find an outfit. High wasted jean shorts, fishnet tights underneath them, and some random white crop top with a rose on it. How do people wear these tights often? I feel like a stripper.

If I was going to be different tonight, I had to wear jewelry. I slowly turn my head over to the direction of her jewelry box, a look on my face. I don't wanna. But I gotta. I then find a black lace like chocker that I kinda liked, not gonna lie. Shit. I'm keeping this. Then, I pulled out a pair of pretty diamond studs, but the diamonds were shaped like a rose, making me look down at my shirt and mentally give myself a round of applause for being great.

Pulling up to the venue, I checked my hair and makeup in a mirror. Yes. You heard me right. Makeup. But it's a "natural look", well that's what youtube said but if it's a natural look it shouldn't be makeup at all-