Meme biiiig booooooyyyyy (God Damnit Chris)

TF2: Life of a Scout Main

(WARNING- TF2 RELATED

IF YOU KNOW NOTHING ABOUT TF2 YOU PROLLY WON'T GET THIS)

Community reasons why Scout is a garbage class-

Primary-
Scattergun- Too damn overpowered

F.A.N- "Why tf would you use a crutch weapon to stun your enemies with the knockback? Can't aim, dipshit?"

Baby Face's Blaster- "Speed Boost reduced when double jump" "Speed Boost removed when hit"
"-10% movement speed when spawn"

*inhale*
*exhale*

N I G 🅱 A W H AT THE A C T U AL F U C c

Back Scatter- do i hear..

crits?

CHEAP ASF KILL YOURSeLF

Soda Popper-
"Was the force-a-nature not crutchy enough for you?"

SODA POPPER OUT THIS BITCH FOR EXTRA JUMPS

I'm not kidding

Seriously, Valve?

Sex-ondaries-
Pistol- You have the strongest shotgun in the fucking game, dude.

Winger- Apparently you're not skilled enough to actually time jumps, so you need a crutch

(You see, I disagree because the weapon also minimizes clip size, while boosting damage. It's a near direct upgrade in my eyes, and I love it.)

Bonk! Atomic Punch-
*breathe*

WUNNA NUNNA NUNNA NUNNA NUNNA NUNNA NUNNA NUNNA

Okay serious judgement

"You too afraid to get hit, so you need invincibility? Cunt."

Flying Guillotine- If you run the sandman, everyone agrees you're a cunt.

But if you run this alone, I'll admit you're just an assface.

You're dumb for not abusing the crits of a sandman stun and cleaver trick

otherwise, you have the lovechild of the boston basher and sandman with sacrifice of a good scout secondary,

And dumb for

M I N I C R I T S

C R I T S S S S S

Pretty Boy's Pocket Pistol-

On Hit: Gain up to +5 health
Wearer never takes falling damage
25% slower firing speed
20% damage vulnerability on wearer

That doesn't sound bad...

waIt

"When weapon is active"

N I G 🅱 A

Mad Milk-
1) Questionable substances "Milk"
2) "What, is your Medic Girlfriend not on your ass and you need to keep yourself at full health you PUSSY"

Crit-a-cola-

I'll stand up for all the weapons except the pocket pistol at this point of the list of weapon insults for scout

But I side with the community that this weapon is a hellsent abomination and abuse of crits

Crits and Movement speed boost?!
+10 damage vulnerability?
Whatever, just fucking run away with the speed boost

It's so fucking cuntish, I will side with everyone on that.

Melee-
Bat- "Stock Melees are fucking garbage"

Eh?

Atomizer- "FUCKING EXTRA JUMP CRUTCH WHAT IS YOUR WINGER NOT ENOUGH"

Boston Basher-
Okay, no one really shits on this. You need to hit your enemy to cause bleed damage, or cause yourself to bleed by missing. I guess it's okay? It's hard as fuck, but okay?

Three Rune Blade (Only when worn with the ninja outfit scout has)

...

YUME DE TAAAKAKU TONDAAAAAAA

(If you didn't get that

That was the first part of the SAO opening

it was a weeb joke)

(Fun fact I actually discovered that The first theme song was literally the most redeeming part of that entire series

fucking... why SAO? You could have been so good but you weren't. Let's save the anime rant for another day, I'm bitching about TF2 lemme get back to that)

Sandman-
"YOU STUN CUNT"

Candy Cane-
"You are so prone to rockets! You can get one shot so easily!"

Well if you did your job as a fuccing scout we wouldn't have this problem

The Holy Mackerel-
"It's a reskin of stock..

still not good. And now you're just a retarded Memer"

So literally all of Scout's arsenal is, "Cheap and cuntish" in case you haven't picked up. While I agree with some examples like Crit-a-cola and the Sandman-Guillotine combo, everything else is debatable. The Winger? Utility weapon. Candy Cane? Free health packs for killing and dodging rockets and grenades, YOUR FUCKING JOB BY THE WAY. And what motherfucker can shit on stock? Yea, it's good, but

it's good? What is there to complain about? A powerful and useful shotgun when used well.

If we eradicated on all powerfully good weapons, Literally 90% of the classes loadouts would fucking houdini into thin air.

In the end, I'm fine with being a Scunt main.

At least I ain't a Snipster main

(NEXT TIME ON POINTLESS TF2 RAMBLES- THE LIFE OF A SNIPER MAIN)