The Wayfinder and the Siren (JohnLock AU)

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A/N Hey My Lovelies!!! Here's another chapter....I'm just gonna apologize right now....I'm so sorry for what you're about to read....Love you guys!!! Enjoy<3

"Sherlock-"

"No." The Siren pushed himself to his feet, hurt and rage filling his body. "What happened to you John? What stole your Life Force?" He stepped closer to the human that had captured his mind and took his face in his hands, wishing he could take the young man's burdens. John stared blankly at him for a moment, before Sherlock watched him deliberately fill his eyes with remorse.

"Sherlock-"

"Don't." Sherlock stepped back, his chest tight and breathing ragged. "Don't lie to me John, not again."

"I didn't lie to you-"

"Yes, you did! You said you were okay, that you wanted to live-" John laughed, a cold, empty sound that sent an unpleasant chill along Sherlock's spine.

"Sherlock, I haven't wanted to live since I was seventeen. You think you're the first? The first poor, helpless soul to try to save me? Yes, you make me feel alive, but so did the war. Feeling alive and wanting to live don't go hand in hand Gorgeous." Sherlock watched him soften his face and posture and step closer. "I'm not going to lie, you made me feel better than I had in years. You're dangerous, gorgeous, and for some unknown reason, you want to be with me. But that doesn't change the fact that I have no will to live."

"A human can rebuild their Life Force, I can help you-" John closed the gap between them and cut off Sherlock's words with a kiss. "Let me help you, John."

"The thought of living, of fighting through every day like I have since I was a teen, makes me so tired. I don't want to do it anymore." John continued to press kisses to Sherlock's lips, even though the Siren was fighting every urge to respond. John was the only being in the universe that could shut Sherlock's mind down with just a kiss and he knew it. "Tell you what, let's go get that burn healed, then I will give you one week to try to talk me out of it-"

"No." Sherlock pushed himself out of John's arms, instantly missing the feeling of the human pressing against him. "No, you don't get to help me if you won't let me help you."

"Don't do this-"

"I won't live without you, and I know that you will just keep me distracted for the week then I'll wake up and you'll be gone." Sherlock lifted his chin defiantly and tightened his hands into fists. "We save each other, or you leave now." John reacted as though Sherlock had physically struck him, stepping back and pain filling his eyes.

"Sherlock-"

"I'm serious John. If you have no intention of letting me save you, then leave now." John closed the distance between them and started kissing Sherlock again. The Siren could feel the weight of the emotion John was pouring into the kiss and felt tears slip from his eyes as he dropped his hands to John's waist and kissed back.

"Please don't make me do this Sherlock. Can't we just pretend? One week, then I'll go, you won't even miss me." Sherlock shook his head, kissing John tenderly once more, not wanting to let him go, but knowing he was going to lose him.

"If I give you one week, I'll fall more in love with you than I already am. I wouldn't survive losing you." John sniffled and Sherlock tasted their tears mixing together on their lips.

"One more night then? Please, I'm not ready to let you go yet." Sherlock shook his head and John sobbed, tucking his head against Sherlock's neck.

"I can't." John nodded against Sherlock's neck, tilting his head back and capturing Sherlock's lips in another soft kiss before stepping away. He reached into his pocket and handed Sherlock his phone.

"I'll call you before-" His voice cracked and he cleared his throat. "You don't have to answer, but I think I'd want to hear your voice one last time." Sherlock nodded, taking the phone and slipping it into his pocket.

John turned and climbed back into his Star Sailor, leaving Sherlock standing alone and breaking on the dock.

"Goodbye John."

"Goodbye Sherlock." John pushed the vessel away from the dock, slowly drifting away from Sherlock.

"I love you." Sherlock whispered as John's boat started to fade from his sight, taking with it the only being that ever truly cared for him.

"I love you." Sherlock's whisper was soft, barely audible over the sounds of E6, but it cut through John's heart like a bullet. He sobbed, but didn't turn around. He had made his choice, and same as Mikey, he wouldn't let Sherlock be the one that found him when he gave up.

"You're really going to do this?" John's inner voice asked, making the tears fall harder. "That creature could make the pain stop, and it would probably hurt less than a blade or gun."

"You're the one that wants to die."

"You want to stay with him though."

"For now, but it won't last and I can't do that to him." John pushed his thoughts aside and focused on sailing away from Sherlock Holmes.

He was about an hour outside of E6, plotting a course to the nearest plot of empty space when he felt the air around him shift. He felt the tips of his ears start to burn with energy and braced himself for an Energy Storm.

What struck him was no Energy Storm.

His knees hit the deck as a harsh note pierced his skull, pulling a scream from his throat and filling his body with pain.

Images of his father's dead body, the people he couldn't save, the fear and pity he saw in his mother's eyes when he told her what he did, filled his mind.

He saw Sherlock, standing on the deck of E6, tears streaming down his face as he sailed away.

He screamed louder and started digging at his skull, trying to pull the sight from his brain. Something in the back corner of his mind told him to stop, that it was The Spider's Song, but he couldn't. He had to make it stop.

He was distantly aware of someone boarding his ship.

It had only been an hour since John left, so when Sherlock felt the phone in his pocket start to vibrate, he scrambled to answer. Maybe John had changed his mind.

The screen was filled with the image of John, on his knees, his nails digging furrows into the sides of his skull as he screamed in excruciating pain.

"Sherlock," a familiar, melodic voice came through the speakers and sent ice coursing through Sherlock's veins. "John Watson, is definitely in danger."