Idol [book 1]

Chapter Three

" Never be afraid to say what you feel. You don't need the approval of anyone. "

-unknown-

*****

I willed my heart, gripped tightly of the picture of my parents and slowly walked to the special car that will bring me to my parents to the crematory. Since there were so many innocent corpses, the process will be getting more sadder.

A lot of family members now are crying over their beloved death but here I am, alone when I gripped the frame of my parents. I feel like I want to cry, kneel and sobbing now, but as their only child, I just sent them in a manner that I've been taught.

The tears escaped again through my eyes when my parent's body enters the crematory. The fire starts to lit up, burning the body that I really loved so much. The environment is getting tenser, many of them were crying, endlessly.

My legs are wobbling and I ended up kneeling on the ground and crying painfully. My heartfelt so much suffocated as I tried to breathe more air. I cried and cried again. I need someone. I need someone for me to share my feeling with someone. Twice aren't allowed to come in since the place is occupied with families of their beloved ones.

" Stay strong, Dahyun. " Someone kneels too beside me and I looked at him. Those eyes, strangely give me energy and calmed me. His face is covered by mask make me harder to recognize him. Who is he?

" Just cry, I'll be here. " He said with his soft voice and I froze. Who is he? Who is this person? How does he know me?

He pulled my head gently and resting it on his chest. I was surprised but I don't refuse to but admit that I liked his hug. He caressed my head, disarranging my hair and I kept my arm lower, prevent myself to pull him closer. Then, he wrapped a scarf around my neck, messily. I can tell, his movement is a bit clumsy. Who is he, again?

" Dahyunnie. "

I looked at Jihyo who is standing against this person's back. She looked at him, weirdly. This man quickly pulled himself from me and slowly walked away from the cremation site. Who is he? Why is he rushed? He doesn't even say anything before he leaves.

" Who is that man? " She asked as she helped me to stand up.

" I-I don't know. He suddenly sat beside me. "

I just realized there is a warm scarf wrapped around my neck. I think it is from the man that leaves me. But, how should I give him back?

" What? You don't even know him? That's weird. "

" How can you be the only one access in here? " I tried to change to the topic 'cause I don't wanna talk about him.

" Well, I thought you might need someone and of course I must do something. " I nodded, understand. Well, I was comforted a bit by that man.

The cremation process is done and I am waiting for my parent's ashes. My hands trembling when the ashes are on my hands.

You were humans whom I loved forever, ashes.

*****

After finishing the burial, I only resting inside my room and staring blankly over my window. Then, someone is knocking the door and came inside, sitting beside me.

" You don't want to eat? " Chaeyoung asking me, putting her head on my shoulder.

" Thanks but no thanks, Chae. I don't have any appetite, " I said, forcing a smile hoping she would understand me that I just wanted to be alone. 

" I completely understand. " She said, get off from my bed before heading for her dinner.

I wiped my tears when my mind starts to flashback when I'm with my parents. There were so many memories between me and my parents. Even bitter memory turned into a sweet memory. That is the power when we are losing someone. Every memory is wonderful, but their death is never wonderful. 

I hate losing someone that I dearly love. I sighed heavily and lay down on the bed. My phone beeping and I reached for my phone. It's a message and I open it.

Annyeong.

from : 89-xxx-xxxx

My eyebrows knitted together as I'm trying to figure who is this person. 

Maybe the wrong number? But, my number is private and how can strangers reach me? 

I yawned, tired so I decided to ignore the message and delete it. Then, I covered myself with my blanket and turned off the table lamp. Before I close my eyes, I prayed, hoping for better days are coming to me.

Anyway, who is the person that comforts me at the cremation site?

*****

updated: 4.6.17

edited: 21.3.18