Fanfic One Shots

Beast Boy

Azarath Metrion Zinthos. Azarath Metrion Zinthos. I repeat it over and over in my head but I can't calm down. I've tried everything and it's just not fucking working. I can feel my temper escalating and my magic pulsating around me. Azarath Metrion Zinthos. Tears begin to pool in my eyes and it makes me even angrier.

I feel so fucking stupid for even letting my emotions get to me this way. Over fucking Beast Boy. He's my friend. He has no obligation to love- or even like for that matter- me back. But I've never felt a pain like this in my chest before. Azarath. Metrion. Zinthos.

I'm desperately trying to calm down, to get my emotions in check. And I can't. I surrender to the tears and let out a wail. It's cathartic. I crumple in on myself and let myself continue to sob loudly.

Just because he kissed me once doesn't mean that he feels the same as me. Just because, in a moment of weakness, I tell him how I feel, doesn't mean that he has to reciprocate my feelings.

But damn it, I wanted him to so badly. Another sob racks through my body and I feel my magic pulsing around me again. I have to get a grip. I sit up and start chanting again, but I allow the tears to continue falling. It gives me a small sense of release.

But, with my eyes closed my mind is flooded with images of him. Flashbacks of the kiss we shared. How we hadn't spoken for a few days after. And how when I went to confront him tonight, he was profusely denying any feelings for me to Cyborg.

The emotions hit me in a fresh torrent and I let out a scream, I can feel my magic releasing from my body, breaking things in my room. I do my best to reel it back in, but my body is distracted, letting out loud, shuddering, ugly sobs. I just want this feeling to go away. I can't handle the pain.

"Raven!"

Everything stops. Except for my shuddering breaths. It was his voice. I didn't even hear him come in. My head snaps up to look at him, I don't care that the tears have started streaming again or that I probably have snot running down my face.

"Why are you fucking here?" I ask with venom in my voice.
He looks taken aback.
"Come to explain why you've been ignoring me for days?"
He cheeks flush a dark green.
"Come to tell me in person that you don't care for me? To explain why you would kiss me and mess with my head like that when you know that you feel nothing for me in that way?"

The last part is barely a whisper as I try to force it out while another sob racks my body. I clutch my chest as the pain hits me anew.

"Raven... I didn't know you were there... When I was with Cyborg. I did-"
"STOP. I don't care what you didn't know! I care about what you DO know. You know that I don't open up to ANYONE! You know that I don't share my feelings! You should have told me that you didn't want me in that way that fucking NIGHT, Beast Boy! I don't know how to deal with this feeling. This is why I don't LET myself feel ANYTHING!" I scream the last part.

I lose control of my magic again as another wail escapes unbidden from my lips.
"Rae, calm down and let me talk to you. Please..." he pleads softly, approaching me with his hands up.

Another pained scream escapes my lips as I see the concern on his face. I can't keep myself levitated anymore. I fall to my hands and knees and suck in a deep breath.

"Leave." I whisper.
"I'm not leaving you, Raven."
"I said LEAVE." I yell. "I don't want to hurt you."
Now he's kneeling in front of me. He places a hand lightly on each side of my face and lifts it up to look into my eyes.
"I said no." He whispers.

He releases my face to move his hands to my shoulders. He gently pulls me onto his lap and tucks my head under his chin. He wraps one arm around me and strokes my hair with the other hand. I grab onto his shirt and ball it into my fists and sob while he gently rocks me back and forth. His scent invades my nose and it's a sweet torture. Every now and then he'll shush me softly and kiss the top of my head.