I remember feeling hurt. Seeing him helpless shot pins through my heart. Seeing unwanted tears, scars, cuts. He's hurt. Looking at him tears me apart knowing he's not okay. Hes trapped in a dark cloud. He needs help. I want to talk to him but seeing him like this breaks me. He's broken. He needs someone. The sound of his heartbeat lingers. The thoughts racing through his mind are eating him apart. What do I do? I can't let him stay like this. If only he knew how much I care about him.
"Victoria, let's go! We're gonna be late to class!"
That's my best friend Ally. She loves school and always flirts with guys way out of her league. Its interesting to see guys flirt back.
My first class is history. I'm not such a big fan of history. History doesnt concern with the present, so why learn it?
There he is. As he walks into class my heart starts to race. I care so much for a guy that probably doesnt even know I exist. He doesnt talk to anyone. Everyday I see him, I can tell he's hurt which really breaks me. Ally knows his broken heart hurts me. She asked me about him before but I changed the subject. I stare at him, reading his inner thoughts, wondering why hes so broken. I just wish I was there, to comfort him, to help him.
After history class, I watched as he fastly exited. I wonder why he ran off so fast. I'm going insane not knowing what has been happening to him. I don't even know his name. He looks so normal yet so broken. I wish i could just fix him.
2 hours has gone by. It's now lunch. Where is he? Did he skip?
"Victoria, come here!" Ally yelled from the other side of the cafeteria.
I walked towards her still looking around for him. He's still not here. I sat in a chair across from Ally. Ally started talking but I doze off thinking about him.
After lunch, I started walking to 5th period.. I have chemistry class and he's in my class. He doesn't have a lab partner though. My lab partner moved about a month ago, so now I work with two others. I would love to be his partner but I know he's an independent guy so Mr. McDonald would never let me.
I walked into chemistry class. He was in there sitting at his table with his hand up to his cheek. I tried not to look at him but I failed and did anyway. I sat down at my lab table still looking at him. I want to talk to him but I can't. I just want to know his name.
After class as I was walking to the door, He dropped his binder and papers fell everywhere. Mr. McDonald was in the hall. I took a deep breath and nervously walked towards him. I bent down helping him gather his papers. I grabbed the last one and looked up. We made eye contact. i was in shock. He has such beautiful green eyes. I gave him his papers. He said thank you and quickly ran out the class. I was shaking. I stood up and walked to my next class. That was the first time we have made eye contact. I should've said something. I'm so stupid!
The school day is finally over. It seems like it has been forever. I met up with Ally since she gives me rides home everyday. She started talking about some guy named "Rich". I was too busy thinking about him. I can't stop thinking about how stupid I am for not even saying anything.
We got to my house and I thanked Ally for driving me like usual. I ran inside noticing no one is home, that's the best part. I ran upstairs into my room grabbing my journal. I started writing in my journal this year. It may seem stupid to write in a journal but actually it helps me. Writing in a journal helps me get out my inner thoughts instead of keeping them trapped. I wonder if he's like that, or if he goes home and sleeps. I wish we talked. I want to be close with him.
I decided to go for a walk. It was a nice day out other than screaming and yelling I heard from a house a couple blocks down. Everytime I go for walks that same house is having problems. I sat down on a big rock in the park. Ever since I was a little girl, I would sit on the rock to watch the sunset. I always pictured me with a boyfriend sitting next to eachother watching the sunset and talking about life. I am. 16 and still have them fantasies. The noise of little kids, nature chirping, and the sound of the wind makes me feel relaxed and calm. I would sleep here if i could.
The sound of an annoying tone started to play. My phone was ringing. I pulled my phone out of my pocket, my mom. I thought for a second, should I answer? Is this really important?
"Hello?" I questioned as I answered.
"Tori, where are you? she question with a rude tone in her voice.
"Somewhere over the rainbow" I smartly replied.
"Ha..ha. cute. Get your ass home now!" she demanded.
"What did I do?" i questioned.
"NOW!" she hung up.
What the hell did I do? Im always doing something wrong. Ugh.
I started to stroll home. My stomach started to feel like pins and needles as i reached close to my home. I am always getting in trouble, for stupid shit.
I opened the front door. Before I could even say anything my mom rudely snickered.
"Why is your room a mess? Why aren't the dishes done? Do you think you can just leave the house whenever you please?" she threw at me.
"MOM, I AM ALMOST 17 YEARS OLD." I got out.
"Yeah and? So you expect me to take responsibility and do all your chores?" she said.
"That never once came out of my mouth" I said.
"Tori, I am so fed up with your shit. Get it together. Next year you graduate but with your grades I dont think any college will except your ass." she argued.
I walked away. Shes obviously drinking. I hate when she drinks so much. Why was she in my room? Did she read my journal? I better hide it. My grades arent THAT bad. Im only failing english because Mrs. Hensal hates me. Like it is not fair she has favorites. Stupid teacher pets up her ass crack. I wonder if they wipe her ass too like how the fuck can she give them A's and I an F. Atleast I read and do the assignments. Im not even going to go any further with that.
*BOOM*
gunshots were fired.
