A series of short stories.

Words Are Hard To Speak

I find it hard to speak what I think when under pressure, my words may not always come out as I plan them to. This makes it hard to tell someone, anyone how I really feel and in some cases I forget the real story. By sitting alone with my thoughts I am able to reflect on what is happening or has happened. The times when I do this may not always be useful or productive but I always find them good, they make me realize if I have done wrong and need to apologise, or if I need to think 'you know what that was a horrible thing for that person to say' and think if the help of someone else is needed. My thoughts calm me, although talking to someone is nice it isn't always the easiest thing to do. School is fine I have a distraction, so I work hard to make sure that the distraction of my school work is done to its best. But that is not always easy. When it comes to prep at house, the problems I have become apparent, I like to be alone to think, I can't work with people messing around while I try to work. If someone is sarcastic to me while I am trying to concentrate or think I get angry easily and this is a big problem. My anger is what controls my day to day life, when I am annoyed I lose control like a time bomb waiting to go off and give havoc to all that surround it. That time bomb, that's me. If I lose control I start to shout, and in some cases I will hit the person. Also I will get really worked up about it and get even angrier which does not help my problem, I know I have a problem which apparently means that I am one step to solving it. However I am not solving anything at this period in time. I need freedom; I need that thing that helps us understand the meaning of life. Life its self.