High school is over. No more petty drama. No more being sleep deprived and no more waking up at an unreasonable time.
Please don't ask me what i'm going to do now that it's over. I have not a single fucking clue. Of course i'm eventually going to go to college. I don't want to go too far from home because i can't leave him.
Him as in Harry. Harry and I were friends since we were 7. Then high school came and he suddenly became this ass hole who only cares about himself. I don't even know what happened to him. I mean, there had to have been an explanation. You don't just change like that. Or maybe you do.
Harry and i grew distant the second he changed. I tried to stick around but he just kept pushing me away. It genuinely hurt. Hurt so bad. but i kept trying until eventually i couldn't anymore. Harry left North Dakota to go back to London. Im not going to college until he's back. Just to calm my nerves.
If you're wondering if we've talked since he's been there, the answers no. If you're wondering how long he's been there. it's been 2 months. He left the day after graduation with no warning what's so ever. I went over to try one last time before giving up and his mom answered the door. She told me where he went and when. she just didn't tell me why. Maybe she didn't know either.
**
"Kat, get off that damn phone." My mom says over the sound of my music playing. i turn it down and look at my mother who is doing the dishes. "Not like you're talking to me anyway." I tell her. She shuts the water off and takes her apron off.
"What's wrong?" She asks me. "What do you think is wrong mom?" I ask in response. She sighs and takes my hand in hers. "Kat, is this about Harry again?" I have to look away from her just because of the mention of his name. "Im sure he's fine hun, probably just had a lot on his mind." I look down at where our hands meet and try to believe what my mother is telling me. Without a word, i nod and go upstairs to my room.
This is the same room Harry and I would do arts and crafts in, and watch the sunset together through my bay window. I would beg him to paint my nails and he would refuse so many times until i gave him my famous 7 year old puppy dog eyes. Those got Harry to do a lot. When we were 8, his dad built us a tree house in the tallest tree in my yard.
Sometimes when Harry was sad, he would come into the tree house and throw pebbles at my window. The first time it happened i was mad and yelled at him. Poor kid cried with his knees pulled up to his chest. I felt so bad that day.
One day Harry snuck into the tree house, really late at night. We were 13 and in 8th grade. One of the last times we were close. It was about 1 in the morning and i heard the pebbles. I crept downstairs and turned on the light to the back patio. Without a second thought i ran up the ladder and sat with Harry as he cried into my chest.
I had no idea why he was crying for at least 20 minutes. I just knew that he needed me more than ever. After awhile though, he stopped crying. He told me that his parents were fighting. I myself was shocked. His parents seemed like they got along great. Maybe because i was so young and naive. I felt so bad for Harry. I wanted to tell him that everything was going to be okay. But i didn't want to promise him anything in case i was wrong.
Maybe that's why Harry is so damaged. His father abused his mother when he was drunk. Once Harry and i hit 10th grade is when he started getting distant. Also when his parents divorced. I don't know what happened to his dad. Why he was so angry. It made me mad that he made Harry so upset.
I let Harry in that night. Let him sleep in my bed right next to me. As i was drifting off to sleep. He softly called my name. "Kat?" I opened my eyes slowly and turned to face him. I couldn't see anything except the little shine from his eyes. "What did i do wrong?" My heart broke the second this question left his beautiful innocent mouth.
"Harry you didn't do anything wrong, sometimes parents fight. It isn't your fault." i reassured him so much that night. Then something i will never forget happened. "Kat." "Yes harry." "I love you." and with that he fell asleep. I felt my heart beat speed up and i felt my stomach do flips. He's never said that before. I know he meant it as a friend but it changed something inside of me. Maybe i actually love love him. But he could never love me the way i do him.
Harry and i haven't shared a bed since then and our parents still haven't found out. Because "girls and boys can never just be friends." But Harry and i were. We were the purest best friends ever.
Ok. Now imagine two young kids, a boy and a girl dancing together outside. Both in white. The girl has long hair, blue eyes and a fresh face, clear of any imperfections. The boy has little curls and deep emerald green eyes. They laugh together and hold hands as they run through a green field. Now imagine a dark thunder storm coming in and ruining their good time. the boy says "I have to go." and the girl says "Don't leave me!" but he does anyway. The girl is soaked, not only in the rain but in tears. That's what happened to their friendship. Something horrible came and so he left.
