To Breathe or Not to Breathe (Night at the Museum fanfiction)

"My name is Inigo Montoya, and may I just say..."

New exhibits.

This was bad.

I had gotten to work a half hour early, at Mr McPhee's request, not knowing what the reason was. Now my stomach was filling with dread as he walked me and Nathaniel through the museum, giving us a "tour" of the new exhibitions.

"Here we have our new Alexander the Great exhibit. It includes a figure him and a vanguard of wax figure soldiers. Then we have a suit of armor added to our medieval section, and then over here," he was saying as he continued down the hall into a room that had been empty before, "we have our Princess Bride wax figures."

"Whoa, whoa, whoa." I held up my hands. "Hold up. I thought this was the museum of natural history. The characters of The Princess Bride are fictional, not people from history."

Mr McPhee shrugged. "We were hoping this particular exhibit would attract visitors of the... newer generation. Even if the characters aren't people from history, the author of the book certainly was."

"The book is terrible." I mumbled. "The Princess Bride is practitally the only exception to the 'book is better than the movie' rule."

Mr McPhee just shook his head and led us down a familiar hall. "Another change you'll be interested to know about are our additions to the... Egyptian exhibit."

My head jerked up. "What?"

No. No no no.

No.

Don't let it be a female, don't let it be a female.

"Yes, we added the wax figures of four Egyptian gods and goddesses in a side room, as well as a very special new exhibit... the sarcophagus of Cleopatra."

I shook my head wordlessly, trying to break away from what had to be a nightmare. This wasn't happening. It couldn't be happening.

Nathaniel shot me a sideways look. "Scared you're gonna have to share Ahk with someone else now?" he whispered sideways.

"Of course not!" I whispered back too quickly. He had hit the nail right on the head. "Why would I be?"

"Anyway, those are all the changes we've made to the museum." Mr McPhee was completely unaware of the dread he had just caused in me. He had no idea of  what really happened here after dark.

And I could tell this was going to create a whole lot of uproar.

When Mr McPhee had finally left, Nathaniel and I stared at each other for a long moment, dreading the night ahead of us.

"What should we do?" Nathaniel finally asked.

"I got nothing." I mumbled. "Except let's please not start out by meeting Alexander the Great. I don't think he's the nicest guy."

"Who would you suggest, then?" Nathaniel gave a half-hearted grin. "The Princess Bride characters?"

"How about the suit of armor?" That seemed to be the safest choice to me.

"Fine by me."

We headed over to the medieval section, and arrived just as the sun set. I called a hello to the Joan of Arc wax figure, whom I'd befriended a few nights ago. She was apparently trying to ward off a persistent Robin Hood, who had taken it upon himself to be her suitor.

The suit of armor, however, didn't seem to be moving. I exchanged a glance with Nathaniel, and we both stepped closer. Completely still, it stood at attention against the wall. I walked right up to it and reached out to touch its arm.