"so lucy, i'm not sure what exactly your intentions were at the beginning of our relationship but i'm glad you stuck it out with me. you may have not told
me, but i don't mind anymore. i'm glad the first two years were spent worry free and we just continued to have fun with each other day in and day out.
i found this letter in your drawer about a month ago. i know you wrote it but i'm going to read it." i coughed slightly and opened the letter.
"david, i know that these days will end soon and you'll be left with a void you think you'll never fill. but trust me, one day you'll wake up with a knowing feeling as if you're content with life, and content with moving forward. i'll never be mad at you for moving forward, i would be upset if you held yourself back from doing so. there will be another girl, that will be able to give you kids and a big beautiful wedding. she may not be me, and she may not be open to you at first. you may hold yourself back and even think of getting out multiple times throughout your first few steps together. but you will find somebody. you're david dobrik. the internet sensation that bullies his friends without a single bad word said to you. you're an inevitable light in people's lives that i hope never burns out. i was a lit candle in the middle of a dark room, trying to live my life to the fullest. i milked that shit for what it was worth and baby, without you it would have been worthless. i'm just a candle who burnt out all of her wax. i will miss you, but i will be upstairs just one blink away. and if you ever need me for absolutely anything, i will flicker a light or move a chair just to freak everyone else out. but i know you'll smile at the creepy things and you'll laugh because you'll know it's me. you're going to have a difficult time, and i know that. i would never ask you to drop an emotion or swallow a thought. i just ask that one day you accept that i am gone, but not for good. i will see you up here baby. i'm waiting with mamosas and your youtube ready to watch so i can tell you how stupid you are with a giant smile on my face. i love you david, and i hope you can once again find happiness."
i closed the piece of paper and slipped it into my pocket.
"lucy, right now id like to say that i don't think i will ever find anybody like you. not in a million lifetimes. and although i knew our journey would be way too short, i did want a family with you. i did want everything with you. and i know you didn't want to start a family because you didn't want to make a child live a life without a mother, and i've always respected that wish. unfortunately that wish did not come true for you, but i want you to know that i'm going to take cary of her. paisley will never have to wonder who you are. i will never let her forget. but i also want you to know that i wanted a big fuss of a wedding with you."
i pulled out the velvet box that i had hidden for months. i opened the box and smiled at the little circle diamond.
"you never liked flashy so it's just a small circle, but it was supposed to be yours. and this afternoon i'm
going to give it to paisley. i know she would want it, and i know you'll be happier that she ha it as opposed to it being locked away in the back of a drawer.
i love you lucia, i'll be back again on saturday" i stood up and put my hand one the top of the tombstone, staring at her name and smiling to myself despite the stray tears that never failed to run down my face.
i blew her a kiss and set off to my car.
i drove home and walked inside of the house where the small pug run up to me and smiled widely.
"hello luna" i picked the dog up and walked into the living room where paisley and her babysitter emily were sat in the middle of the carpet with paisley's large barbie house set up and dolls laying all around the room.
"daddy!" paisley sprung up and ran to me before hugging me tightly.
"hi baby" i put down the dog and hugged my daughter.
"i'm sorry my toys are everywhere daddy! i'll clean them before we go to dinner i promise!" her eyes for a little bigger but i smiled and shook my head.
"it's okay sweetie, just don't leave the mess for emily to pick up, okay?" i asked and paisley nodded quickly. she turned around to run away but i caught her little hand.
"i brought something for you. i was going to give it to your mommy before she left, but i was never able to. i figured she'd wanted you to have it." she smiled widely at me as i opened the box and showed her the ring.
"it's so pretty!" she yelled and i smiled softly at her.
"just like you, princess" i pressed a small kiss to her forehead and gave her the box before she ran back to emily and continued to play with her toys.
YOU ARE READING
forever | david dobrik ✓
Fanfiction"all we see is light, for forever" -dear evan hansen ~ this is rly bad i wrote it when i was a bAby. that's all,, you've been warned ~
