Unspeakables

A Little Background

   I once had a journal before. I was younger, maybe about seventeen. My doctor said it would be good for my depression. Therefore I tried. Although I'm not an expert when it comes to writing, it still turned out decent. I hope this one turns out better. This one means something and hopefully it will be helpful for if something happens to me.
   Let me start from the beginning the best I can. My name is Cadelyn Mae Jones. I'm nineteen and struggle with anxiety and depression. I was also born with what some call a gift and I always called a curse.
   I was born with the natural ability to communicate with ghost. I say communicate but I can't talk to them. I just hear, see, and can feel their presence. I feel like if I didn't push my abilities away that I may be able to talk to them and be a great medium. I will admit it scared me to death. (The first encounter I remember I was around six years old.) Therefore I simply stoped listening and they stoped talking. I'm sure they never meant to harm me it just terrified me.
   Anyways I was always hearing my name. There was even a time I heard my name outside like a call for help. Eleven years old, I get up without a second thought. Stoped playing with my friend and just went outside. Strangely I knew just where to go. When I got there I found our family dog trying to play with my newish kitten like it was a toy. I got out there just in time to save my kittens life.
   To this day I struggle with this one. I'm not sure if this was a ghost doing or if something else was at works here. I always thought ghost until recent happenings here. I'm getting ahead of myself so moving on.
   When I was twelve I saw a shadow man. I was up watching tv around ten at night when I looked over and saw him. The light off the tv didn't seem to change his color. The walls behind him was lit up but he wasn't. All black and couldn't tell any features but I could feel his eyes on me at that point. Scared little me hid under my cover because that so would help. Luckily for me he wasn't there to hurt anyone. When I peeked to look at him again he was moving. It wasn't moving like a person would it was so like slow but knowledgeable. He was moving to my sisters room. This is all I remember about that night. The next day I told my mom and sister. I don't remember what they said unfortunately.
   Then to this day I still am reached out to by poltergeist. Like knocking a picture down that was above my bedroom door. Had been jumped around by and had the door slam just for it to randomly fall one day when no one is home. Not only did it fall face up but turned around so when I opened my door it was faced perfect to me when it shouldn't have landed this way. I guess you can't really pin point this one but I felt something strange when I walked in the room. Something I never encountered but I also felt like desperate hope. I sat down and tried to communicate I couldn't though. Well I got nothing in return.
   I was around twelve or so when I found out my mom was no normal person. I found out about her magical side. The closest thing to describe is Wiccan. She has told me some stories. Even one of a demon who took a liking to her? Thinking of this now. I hope she was right and I hope he still protects her. If this stuff that is going on is true... we are gonna need him.
   It's not like I don't want to believe my mom. I just grew up with everyone saying all that stuff is fake and then bam my mom is saying it's real. It threw me through a big loop.
   Well I think I'm going to make this the end of this part. I have been trying to write this for hours now. There is just so much to cover and I'm not really sure what's all apart of what's going on and what's not. It would just make it so much easier is we knew what I was.