"you can close your eyes to the things you don't want to see, but you can't close your heart to the things you don't want to feel."
i suggest you read the book SKYLAR before this one if you haven't already
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skylar, stiles and scott were now going to see the guidance counselor, to help cope with the matt situation.
every time skylar had went she didn't say much, until this session.
"you know when you're drowning, you only take your last breath before you black out. voluntary apnea they call it. no matter how much you're freaking out, your instinct to not let any water in is so strong that you won't actually open your mouth until you get this feeling as if your heads exploding. but then when you finally do decide to let it in, that's when it stops hurting. and it's not scary anymore. actually it's kind of peaceful." skylar said, but as she talked she didn't make eye contact, she just played with her bracelet.
skylar kept thinking back to when matt was drowned, she remembers seeing his ghost. she remembers him telling her that he wanted her dead before passing through her body. she remembers him telling her it wasn't over. it was never over.
"are you saying you hope matt felt peace in his last moments?" mrs. morell asked, looking at her.
"i mean, i don't feel sorry for him." skylar said, but she knew deep down she did.
skylar always saw the good in everyone, she wasn't always happy about it, but it was something everyone loved about her.
"can you feel sorry for the nine year old matt who drowned?" mrs. morell asked.
"well just cause a bunch of idiots dragged him into a pool when he couldn't swim doesn't really give him the right to go off and kill them all one by one. and i'm also aware that they found a bunch of pictures of allison and i on matts computer. he'd photoshop himself into pictures that he had of us. stuff like holding our hands, kissing us. like this whole fake relationship that he had built in his mind. so yeah, maybe drowning when he was nine was what sent him off the rails, but he was definitely riding the crazy train." skylar told her, and she finally looked up at her.
"one positive thing came out of this, though. right?" mrs. morell asked.
she was referring to how stiles' dad got his job back as the sheriff.
"yeah, stiles' father got his job back, but stiles thinks there's still some tension between them. just like how i feel there's some tension between scott and i." skylar admitted.
"have you talked to him since that night?" mrs. morell asked her.
"not really, no. but i understand, he's got his own problems to deal with. i don't think he's talked to allison either. that could be more of her choice though. her moms death hit her pretty hard. but it did bring her and her dad closer. and jackson? he hasn't really been himself lately. it's funny how as of right now, lydia is the one who seems the most normal for once." skylar said.
"and what about you, skylar? how's your relationship with stiles going? i know he waits outside for you after every session." mrs. morell said.
"my relationship with stiles, is probably the best thing i got going for me right now." skylar said, and she nodded.
