When given the choice between being right or being kind, choose kind.
I still remember this sentence my grandmother used to whisper in my ear every time before i went to sleep. She understood that my family environment, rich parents, was toxic enough to turn me into an avaricious person from a young age. When she died, a homeless man murdered her, i remember, i would cry for weeks, but after a time with a lot of anxiety pills and sessions with psychologists i got over it and started to act like my parents.
The top of the hill was when the murderer was sent to prison and i remember i was going every week, to face him and curse at his whole existence about what he did to me. He was a middle aged man with kind eyes as my grandmother would describe him, sitting there every time listening to me and say nothing except sorry now and then between my yells or my threats to his family.Only once he said that he didn't kill her. But i needed someone to blame. Often i was driving in front of his house in the poor neighborhood to see his family from afar, hate them unwillingly and then stare at the only light in the street that under it she died.
It was worse when i found out that the man behind the bars was the one my grandma was giving money to nourish his family. It took me five more years and a secret diary behind her closet in her old house to understand the meaning of life. She had this sentences, quotes, about life and kindness, each page would make me cry even more of what she was and what person i had become. She explained how she helped this man and his family, what problems they had. And at the end was the sentence she used to say to me every time before i go to sleep. It hit me immediately.
For so long i thought the right thing was to curse at the man for what he did, my way of finding closure about her death but the truth is that if she trusted him i should do it too. I remember giving money for a new investigation, the real murderer got caught, i set him free and helped his family until now with money and made him a member in my company.I pushed away my parents and actually started to find real people around me, poor or rich it didn't matter anymore.
At the end of this story i guess, what i learned is that not everyone is what it seems and not always the right thing is the kind thing to do. And kindness at the end of the day will always pay you back with more kindness. But also, that day my grandmother died under that only light in the street, the only light in my street died, but will always stay within me.
