Blaze

Part 12

ONE MONTH LATER

JAYDON'S POV

I hummed as I put on yet another load of washing. Mikey and Joey were at their respective schools and I didn't have to pick Joey up until 1pm. It was only 10am and I had already made their beds and my own, cleaned up their toys in the lounge room, vacuumed, and cleaned the kitchen in preparation for dinner, so now all I had to do was put on the washing and eat something. The morning sickness had finally stopped so I finally had a bit of energy. Blaze was only home when the boys were and didn't really acknowledge me, I was working really hard to not care, he now had to cook his own meals and do his own laundry, I didn't check up on him anymore, I couldn't deal with the rejection so I just ignored it.

BLAZE'S POV

My wife had been gone a month and I missed the fuck out of her, sure I saw Jaydon everyday but she wasn't my wife. I didn't get smiles, I didn't get a packed lunch anymore, I missed the ribbing I got from the boys because of it. I didn't have soft, nice smelling clothes anymore and I didn't have the feeling of contentment I used to have knowing at the end of the day I could get comfort out of my wife.

I missed her so much but didn't know how to get her back, I didn't know how to get her affection back and didn't know if I deserved it. It took me a month to realise the change in her, I got her blank stare all the time, but I thought she would get over it, it's not like I'm cheating on her, my hand and I are well acquainted nowadays. But I haven't seen her smile in a month, I haven't seen her laugh unless it's with someone else and I have slept beside her but she hasn't shared any of her warmth and softness with me since the disastrous trip to the zoo.

I'm ashamed of the fact that it took loosing the comforts she brought me to realise I was being a shallow asshole. I still love her so much my chest aches constantly due to our 'separation' at the moment, I miss her smiles and her hugs, I miss her running her fingers through my hair, I miss how my clothes used to smell, I miss my packed lunches and I even miss her appetite. I miss everything I used to have with her and it's my own damn fault for being a fucking idiot. But as I stand watching her separate my laundry from hers and the kids I know it's going to take some serious grovelling to get her back.

"Hello Blaze, did you forget something? Joey won't be home until 1." She stated without turning around. This broke my heart more, she thought I only came home for the boys, I just didn't want it to be awkward so I only spent time at home when they were here hoping that if I helped out more with them it would soften her attitude towards me, looks like I read that wrong.

"No... I didn't forget anything I just wanted to see if you needed some help around the house..." I winced at how meek and lame I sounded but I didn't know what to do.

Jaydon kept her back to me but turned her head to look at me briefly before turning back to the laundry in front of her.

"I've done everything, there was no need for you to come back, if you want to pick Joey up today I'll go up the street and do some grocery shopping."

"I uh, I can do that." Fuck I've turned into a teenage boy in front of his first crush.

"No Blaze, it's my job to look after everything, if you want to pick up Joey you can otherwise I need to hit the shops now." She had turned the washing machine on and made to walk passed me.

"I want to help." I grabbed her upper arm and instantly craved more of her softness against me.

She quickly stepped back from me, "The shopping list is on the kitchen bench." With that she walked away from me.

I was at a loss with how I was supposed to deal with her. She seemed so cold and standoffish I didn't know how to approach her. I sighed dejectedly before grabbing the shopping list from the kitchen and heading into town.