Dork Diary Part 1: What is life?

Dork Diary Part 2: Girls are weird.

Saturday, April 10, 2014 5:08 pm

The ball was yesterday. It was the worst social event of my life. Firstly, I forgot to change my clock to daylight savings time so I was 30 minutes late, which didn't impress Jessy. She looked beautiful, by the way. Obviously Michael was a bit slow and didn't realize I was Jessy's date until I told him that he was sitting in my chair and flirting with my girl. So he left, but also stuck cheesy pizza all over my back, so Jessy couldn't dance with me unless she wanted mozzarella and tomato all over her hands, so Michael took her and left his date, a nice but plain-looking Taniesha, to be 'wallflowered'. He's such a prick. So that was my night. Any questions? No, alcohol was not served, but brought along anyway. I smell a pot roast, so I'm logging off. Hopefully Michael is sick on Monday so I have time to fix things with Jessy, she seemed more interested in Michael by the end of it. Goodnight.

Monday, April 12, 2014 12:01 pm

Yesterday wasn't interesting enough for an entry so I used that time to think of what I'm gonna say when I ask out Jessy. Yes, I'm going to ask her to be my girlfriend. I was thinking of maybe writing her a note, something like, "Will you be the crab to my nebula?" But that's a bit weird, and I doubt she even knows what the Crab Nebula actually is. But I'll probably just wing it when the time comes, which I have decided will be on Thursday, so we have time to get to know each other. We'll see...

Tuesday, April 13, 2014 6:15 pm

I talked to Jessy today. I even managed to sit with her at lunch. She is quite funny, making jokes about Michael's desperate, soppy attempts at getting a dance in at the ball. She says he has nice eyes, but nothing really special. I take this opportunity to tell her about how he has a thing for Annabeth. She doesn't seem to mind, which means I'm above at least one person on her 'future date' list. I ask her what kind of music she likes. She listens to anything but has a fondness for rock, so we start talking about our favorite bands for a while. She's interesting. Thursday will definitely be when I make my move.

Thursday, April 14, 2014 9:13 am

I'm about to ask out Jessy. She's kinda just sitting with a few friends so I don't know if I should wait until they leave. They're not going to leave, so I'm going to ask Jared if he can call her over and give her the note I wrote. It basically says "I like rock music too. So will you be the Rock to my Roll? We would make a good harmony." It's super cheesy but I couldn't think of anything else suitable. Okay, Jared is walking over to her. He keeps looking back at me  which is annoying, I don't want her to see me and think I'm too whimpy to ask her in person. They're sorta talking now, he tries to give her the note but she just keeps talking, just shut up already. Right, he's coming back...but he still has the note. Why the fuck does he still have it? Then he says to me, "Dude, I couldn't stop her. She just...asked me out."