Cancer (Their Story.)

Save Voicemail?

Call from ASHTRAY <3 <3 ;)

Ignore.

Naomi's voicemail played and Ashleigh's voice boomed through the speakers. She was clearly drunk, and anger flared in Naomi's chest. It twisted like a coil around her heart, squeezing and squeezing in an attempt to shatter her heart into pieces. 

"I know I broke your heart... And..." Deep inhale and a cough, "I know you won't forgive me for that because I was like, the one person you could trust, and I took that trust and I-" Another inhale, this time it was choked, making Naomi's heart twist in sadness. "I took it for granted." Naomi could imagine her curled up in the apartment in her uniform, her golden hair astray and makeup beginning to smear. Naomi could imagine her soft features contorting into pain as she lifted the thin opening of the bottle to her lips and letting the yeasty liquid pour into her mouth, a few drops slowly rolling down her chin and falling onto her stained white blouse. 

Naomi sat in the hotel bed, Her angled eyes were puffy from crying because she couldn't stop crying for the last three days. She was dehydrated and sore from pacing back and forth, replaying the argument over and over in her head. 

Ashleigh had gotten a bit tipsy after a party and Naomi lost her temper after some random guy started hitting on her. Ashleigh, in her drunken rage, said some things that echoed in Naomi's mind over and over. At first, Naomi felt reckless anger run through her body, setting her blood on fire and spurring her on as she spit out horrible insults towards the woman she loves, and once it faded it sent her deep into the depths of sorrow, to the point where she debated giving into the voices of addiction buzzing around in her brain, but somehow she didn't give in and hid away in some crappy motel to mourn the loss of her relationship. Naomi listened to the voice mail again, listening to her true love stumble over her words and fight with her tongue to say the right thing.

"I need... I want you to know that I was angry at first, God, for a moment I thought it was all over. But Naomi, I'm not angry anymore. I miss you too much to be angry with you. I-I'm not begging for you to come home but..." Ashleigh sighed into the phone, "I need you, Naomi. Please, can you just pick up? I need to hear your voice."

Should she pick up the phone? Is it a good idea? God, she wanted Ashleigh to stop, to hang up and leave her alone. She's trying so hard to be angry with her. Naomi hesitated, her bottom lip trembling as she stared at Ashleigh's contact picture on the phone; an unexpected picture of her laughing, her eyes glittered like stars and Naomi couldn't pick which one is better, her smile or her ocean blue eyes.

"Oh, my God. I'm still kinda drunk. You know I generally don't drink because of... Well, I'm drinkin' tonight and I need you to come home, please, I need to talk to you, I need-" A shudder, "I miss you more than I can imagine, and it's only been like..." Shuffling noises along with a mumble of 'where is my watch?' "Like, two days."

Two days. Naomi looked at the clock, biting her lip. The days had blended together and it seemed like longer; like this agony would never end.

"Remember when I first met you? I don't beli-believe in love at first sight, but when I saw you curled up on the sidewalk, it was like a jolt of lightning to me and I just really wanted to help you, because I could see through your- your hard shell and see the beauty inside!" Ashleigh chuckled through her tears, sniffling grossly into the phone, "Ooh, wait, wait." More shuffling noises and a loud, familiar creak of the piano being opened.

Is she going to play? Naomi heard a few hesitant notes ring through the phone, they were shy, their song shaky before it began to form into a lovely sonata, the notes were soft at first, but became faster and stronger; the song was sweet itself and it gave off a very romantic feeling. 

The song broke something in Naomi. She threw her phone and it hit the wall hard, Ashleigh's song didn't stop. It seemingly filled the room with her, God, why can't Naomi be mad at her? Why did Naomi forgive her for something she has hated people for doing. 

Her, her, her. 

Ashleigh didn't deserve this. She didn't deserve Naomi's anger, nor her silence, she didn't deserve to cry, she didn't deserve to be forgiven... Did she? Naomi has punched people for saying less to her, yet Ashleigh somehow gets a free pass. Why? Why?? Naomi wanted to punch stuff, to kick, to scream, to drink, to numb herself to this harsh reality that threatened to drown her.