Introduction

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In a city there lived a hero. Not a hero you know, like Captain America or Wonder Woman, but one that took absolutely no action to save anyone. Yes, she could've easily stopped crimes from happening, but she did not. Instead she stayed in her small apartment on the 7th floor, where the AC did not work during the summer and the fire alarms never went off when there was a fire. She was neither happy nor sad, and lived an average life around average people, almost as if she did not have a supernatural strength.

I was that "hero". Oh, I know what you're going to say. 'Why wouldn't you take action and save the world? Being a hero sounds awesome!' Well you can shut the fuck up right there because being a hero is NOT awesome. It's stressful, and my therapist says I don't need anymore of that. Plus I'm graduating next year, so I'm busy studying. Or at least I should be. Instead I'm procrastinating by watching YouTube in a pile of dirty clothes, eating cold chicken nuggets.

So yes I was content with myself and my self pity. That was until this one asshole showed up. This asshole is named David and he's an actual hero. You know, one that actually does stuff. Here's how it went:

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