Heart of the stray {bxb} ON HOLD UNTIL FURTHER NOTICE

2.

I wake up with hazy eyes and an almost blank memory from the previous night. The only thing I can remember is what he said. Alpha, if I didn't have a fear for them before I do now.

I climb onto my paws and smell my way back to the lake. My fast healing may have healed my wounds but I still feel dirty and now, impure.

I collapse into the water bed, creating little waves that crash into each other and me. I look down at the tiny waves that strip the thin layer of dirt and blood from fur leaving behind the broken wolf that is me.

My ears droop the same way my eyes do. I'm hungry, hurt, cold and now wet. Sure normally I wouldn't care and just try and hunt my next meal to last me another couple of days but what's the point? If I don't accidentally starve myself either my mate or another rouge will come and kill me off.

Maybe not my mate but definitely a rouge. Heck, last night was a close call, too close.

I shake my wolfy head and drown my snout into the slightly less crystal clear water and blow bubbles. The bubbles succeed in what I wish and calm me down enough to think. I lift my dripping head out of the water and take a deep sniff.

Trees, water, grass, birds, blood, nothing to eat. With a huff, I got up from my laying position so I could at least hunt down something.

I take a couple of steps but the stinging pain makes itself known by firing up and down my spine, the pain is too much to handle. I lay back down almost collapsing and take deep breaths letting out pained whimpers here and there.

I gently roll onto my back, my paws folded in front of me and look out to the sky, watching the hush sky blue paint the world as soft sheep looking clouds float by only to get hidden again by the light and dark greens of the forest.

I could die today. I could just leave this life behind and join my family and my old pack. How I miss those blurred memories. Sad really I can't even remember my mother's face or my dads. I don't know what kind of child I was or what my home looked like all I can remember is the orange and red glow of the fire that destroyed it. The horrible pack that slaughtered those who tried to run to safety and that gruff alpha who made me stand their and witness as my pack fell to pieces. I was naturally weak, as an omega. The alpha had told me that is why I survived. That's laughable, this is just what it is survival, this is not living I'm practically half dead at this point.

I shake my head at the memory. I can't live in the past, all I can do is try in the present to make sure I have a future.

I flop myself back over and steady myself back on my paws. Taking gentle, quiet steps through the forest.

-

After three hours of hunting, I had found a deer fawn that had been badly injured and left alone to die. So I ended its suffering and brought it back to my lake to eat before I moved out of this beautiful part of the forest.

As I ate my nose caught tiny amounts of something delicious smelling. To faint to recognise though.

I shake it off assuming it is just another wildflower like the last time and eat what's left of the deer.

I clean my muzzle as the scent gets stronger, with a slight growl at myself I decided to follow the scent cursing my curious mind as I go.

I keep my ears open and aware of my surroundings, being hyper-aware from yesterday and on edge. The smell gets stronger but so does a slight sound of rushing water.

I step through a row of shrubbery and into something that can only be described as a dream.

A large cliff is hidden amongst the tall trees with large amounts of water cascading down its rocky surface to the pool below. Patches of wildflowers appear with the green grass that looks soft and inviting.

It looks nice, calm, sorta like a happy place. It looks like a trap. A trap I would gladly take. My paws step into the welcoming atmosphere and immediately get sucked into the long warm grass. I stick my nose into a flower sniffing in deeply. 

Almost like a cat exposed to catnip, I begin to roll around in the soft grass and let out short barks of joy. Something I hadn't felt in a long time.

A rustling in the bush brings me out of my happy mind space and into a defensive pose keeping my ears held high and my nose twitching trying to determine the bucket load of smells that seemed to have just appeared.

I curse myself for letting my guard down once again and not being more aware of my surroundings. I also curse my wolf for not being with me more.

I keep my eyes peeled on the bushes in front of me. Letting out a low growl on instinct.

My nose catches a smell amongst my defensive growling. I lift my head in the air trying to determine this new, almost, intoxicating smell.

It's faint yet strong something akin to dark chocolate and mint with a hint of the forest leaves. Wolf.

My wolf stirs from his sleep like state at the scent, giving off an approving growl before uttering a single word that brings both lust and terror into my being.

'Mate...'

The lust because whoever they are, they are my mate but the terror because I'm a rouge. A rouge who is on the line of turning wild and losing touch with my human and wolf and going straight on instinct. A rouge who doesn't even know what my human form looks like little alone how to shift.

I begin to panic as both the rustling and the smell come closer towards me. What if they don't accept me. What if my mate kills me.

My wolf gives off a deadly growl at the thought. The growl accidentally leaving past my muzzle. The other pack wolves which have seemed to have emerged from the undergrowth taking that as a threat and get ready to pounce.