I Want It That Way

"Taehyung-ah!" My mother whispered waking me up for school. I rubbed my eyes and sat up. Her frail hands were shaking as she handed me a plate of food. "Did you eat yet eomma?" I asked observing her. She looked into my eyes then looked down. "Yes." She lied to me. I could tell she hasn't eaten anything. She's weak and pathetic. She's too nice to everyone. She had me. Too sweet to kill an innocent child, conceived by rape.
I just watched her exit the small room into the kitchen. "I made you lunch." She smiled. Whenever we had enough food for me to take a lunch she got happy. "Yeah okay." I took the lunch bag from her and walked to school.
The food was never good, it was always the cheapest thing she could find, but healthy.
"Taehyungie~" some bitch smiled and waved at me. I wanted nothing to do with her. She was just too much for me. Too much of a fucking idiot to understand I want nothing to do with her. "How many times do I have to say I'm not interested?" I sighed at her. She frowned. "Every guy is dying to get with me, why not you?"
"Because I'm not dying to get herpes, AIDS, HIV, or any other STD you're carrying, besides 12 abortions." She slapped me. Being the extra bitch she is. "How dare you!" She yelled at me. I just laughed. I got down to here height and looked her dead in the eye. "Honey, I'm gay."
By the afternoon the biggest talk of the school was my statement of being homosexual. I didn't care. They shouldn't either. It's not really their business, but whatever.
"Hey, Tae, let's go out and get some drinks tonight." My friend Yoongi whispered making sure no one heard him. "Nah, you're going to get drinks, you want me to flirt with the lady to get them for you for free." I knew his games. "Come on, I'm getting a group of guys, we can go to a club, I'll have you home by bedtime." He teased. "Alright fine, I'll go, but I gotta tell my mom first, or she'll freak out if I'm not home." Walked with Yoongi and saw his other friends. I didn't talk to them. We were all Sophomores-except for a Junior. "Alright Namjoon and Hoseok, this is the kid I'm telling you about. He's wild." Yoongi introduced. I could tell they were just like Yoongi, stoners to a whole new level. "Imma drop this kid off at his house, we can go to Namjoon's house, then we can go back and pick the twerp up." And by twerp he meant me. He was, they closest thing I had to an older brother. He was held back for a year. Not the brightest light bulb, but he's been there for me.

"Uh mom, I'm going out tonight with my friends." I told her, while helping with groceries. She's so weak yet tries to do so much. Pathetic. "Any girls going with you?" And there it is. "No, just me and some guys." I sighed. "What guys?" She was so annoying. "Yoongi mom. Yoongi and his friends." I wanted to yell at her for being so stupid. "I don't like that Yoongi, he seems like a bad influence on you." I rolled my eyes. "Maybe you should pick my friends." I grabbed my jacket and left. There was time before Yoongi was coming to pick me up, but I didn't really care. I took a walk around our ghetto neighborhood, my home. The memories of my mom walking me to school everyday washed over me. Everyday she'd have a new injury, caused by my deadbeat dad. He beat her so bad once he sent her to the hospital. Of course we didn't have money to pay for it, so I did what any 6 year old would do, steal from other people. I was never proud of every crime I committed, but I had to. She thinks I'm some angel, but I'm not. I've tainted my hands by stealing, by defacing public property, I got arrested once for armed robbery to get my mom the pills she needed, thankfully Yoongi has rich parents who were able to get me out of it.
"TAE!" Yoongi yelled snapping me out of my thoughts. "Get in."

The night went by in a flash. Girls, drinks and I wanted nothing to do with it. I was the designated driver. Mainly because I didn't drink. My father did and I promised myself I would never. It's the one thing I didn't do wrong. However Yoongi, he was taking shots like it was nothing. "Hey liver cancer lets go!" I yelled at him. I tried to pull him off some girl but ended up touching her boob. "I'm so sorry I-" she socked me in the face and I fell to the ground. "Holy shit." I put my hand against my jaw.
After 30 minutes I got everyone in the car and drove them home. By home I meant Yoongi's apartment. He no longer lived with his parents. They still supported him, they just didn't want to waste their time with him. I left Yoongi's car at his house and walked home. It was dark and empty in the streets. Eerie. I came within inches of the front door and heard muffled screaming. I busted through the door and saw my idiot dad, drunk again holding my mom down. I never wanted to see my mother like that. It was disgusting. I grabbed a beer bottle from the table and walked into the room. "GET THE FUCK OFF HER!" I smashed the bottle against his head and stabbed him with the busted shard I had in my hands. My once pale hands were now covered in blood. "I-" I couldn't find the words to describe the situation. I felt, shocked. My mother looked at me in horror. I looked at her. Small, frail and opened to the world. "Taehyung." She sobbed coming towards me. "GET THE HELL AWAY FROM ME!" I pushed her off and took off. I ran to the place Yoongi showed me once. I smiled at the sky and then at the water. And I jumped off that cliff.