Dark Withdrawals (boyxboy)

Reoccurring Flashbacks

I never thought we would be where we are right now. I lazily looked down at my green-eyed queen, as she rested her head on my chest while she slept. I gazed at nothing in particular, zoning out, as I reflected on the life changing event that I thought would prevent me from ever having moments like this again.

For the third time in the past ten minutes, the lighting of my iPhone screen automatically caught my attention, as I tried to keep my focus on the road to the Grammy pre-party.  I gripped my clammy hands on the steering wheel of the Lamborghini that I rented for the evening, hoping that the heavy tension in the car would soon pass, but the clearing of the Robyn's throat let me know that I needed to get my story together quick.

"Chris, who is that?" she asked me in her thick Barbadian accent, as I slowed down approaching a red light. I could feel the dryness in my throat intensify before I let the lie escape my lips, "Don't worry about it bae. Probably just that nigga Rico, reminding me to come by after the party to finish the hook to the track we was working on," I dryly voiced out. Shit, I really need to play this off better. I looked over and looked at her defensive position. Arms crossed, jaws clenched, and looking straight ahead at nothing in particular. Hopefully she'll drop this shit soon before we get to this party. Sighing, I reached over to run my fingers along her arm in an attempt to calm her down, waiting for her to respond. Our eyes connected, small hints of red tainting her hazel eyes from the street light giving her a dangerous look, but I refused to look away. Putting on my best poker face, I let her try to read me. I felt the brushing of her fingers along my hand before she gave me a slight smile, which I reflected, and in that instant, the atmosphere changed, along with the light.

I slowly exhaled, silently thanking the lord for getting me out of another argument with this girl. 

"Baby, I'm sorry. I just, I kind of, I don't know. I'm just want to be back where we were, when our trust was strong," she confessed, stumbling over her words.

"So you don't trust me?" I questioned, earning no response. It was times like this where I wished we listened to the radio to drown out the tension.

"You don't trust me, Robyn?" I repeated, slightly irritated.

"First of all, watch the attitude. What do you expect me to say? You've already cheated on me twice and I forgave you, but I'm tired of trying to prove that I want you and only you, while you do whatever you want! It's like you forget that our lives are not private! Everyone in the world sees you when you are with all of these other girls and I'm embarrassed. So you can't blame me for not trusting you. I'm not fucking coming back if you do it again, Chris!"

I watched her chest rapidly rising and falling after she was finished, slightly turning me on. "It's not even that serious, babe. I love you and only you, and that will never change. I made mistakes in the past, but trust me, there's nobody else-". The ringing of my phone interrupted my well rehearsed speech and put an unsettling feeling my stomach. I quickly reached down and rejected the call from the unsaved number, not daring to even look at my aggravated girlfriend. Neither of us said anything, until I received two text messages back to back.

"Who the hell is that?" she yelled, making me jump in my seat. I accelerated, hoping to get to the party before things escalated.

"Don't fucking ignore me! Who is it? Let me see your phone right now!" she continued, reaching for my phone.

I snatched it out of her hand, just as she grasped it. "I told you it was Rico!" I exclaimed, going along with the lie I started.

"Nigga don't fucking play me! Give me the phone now!" she responded, holding her palm out. I laughed her off and smacked her hand away, before I shifted my phone to my other hand.