One Choice can Change Everything

I'm Sorry

Sorry this took so long!! School was rough this last semester! Enjoy and please review!

Tris POV

Tobias and I get home from the Therapy session. I head into our little kitchen to make some dinner. I feel so many different emotions running through my brain. I feel like I'm being pulled in a thousand directions and I am terrified I am going to snap.

What did the therapist mean by "harming herself or others"? Does she think I'm a monster? Does Tobias agree with her? He didn't defend me. Do I agree with her? At this point I just don't know. I start to count all the blood on my hands.

Mom.

Dad.

Al.

Uriah.

Caleb-

"Stop Tris" I tell myself.

Breath.

In. Out. In. Out.

I finish dinner up before Tobias starts suspecting something. I rarely get time alone since the Bureau. Everyone thinks I am going to crack.

I move around the kitchen making Tobias' and mine plates and I yell for him to let him know dinner is done.

"Thanks, hon" he says.

"No Problem" I reply.

We sit in an uncomfortable silence. There's so much to say, yet we say nothing. Maybe he's thinking about how much of a nutcase I am. Does he still love me? I love him more than he can ever know. Without him I wouldn't be here. I would be a broken shell of a human. Does he know that? Should I tell him? What if he rejects me-

"I'm sorry" I blurt out.

Finally making eye contact with me, his deep blue eyes are staring into me. His eyebrows are drawn in confusion.

"What are you talking about, Tris?"

"Be Brave" I think to myself. Here goes nothing. I draw in a shaky breath.

"I'm sorry I am broken. I am sorry I haven't been a good girlfriend. I'm sorry I'm so stupid and crazy. I should be helping you, you are so strong, Tobias. And I'm not. You deserve someone who doesn't have to take pills to be a functioning member of society" my voice is cracking and getting louder. "I love you more than you will ever know and I'm sorry I've been to selfish to tell you that. Without you I am just an empty shell."

I am too scared to look into his eyes. And then I feel his strong arms around me.

"Tris" he whispers "You are the bravest girl I have ever met. You are a perfect mix of all the factions. I have never seen someone as smart, selfless, kind, honest, and most of all brave. You are also breathtakingly beautiful, but beauty wasn't a faction. And I know what you are thing, I am not just saying that. I choose you, every day. I love you, my amazing Tris."

Tears prick at my eyes. He always knows how to make all my fears go away. I don't know how to respond. So, I kiss him. I kiss him until all the stress and worries fade away. I love this man, and I want to show him. We head up to bed, our dinner long forgotten.

Tobias POV

I wake up and roll over to find Tris' side of the bed cold. I look at the clock. It reads 1:02 AM. Where could she be? My mind automatically goes to the worse. I walk around this house and then I hear the worst sound my heart could think off. I hear muffled sobs.

I walk into the living room to see Tris on our leather couch crying. You can tell she's trying to keep them quiet. I immediately go next to her and place her on my lap. I run my fingers through her golden hair. Even like this, she is still so perfect.

"Tris" I whisper.

She doesn't respond "Tris" I say a little firmer.

I grab her chin and turn her head to meet my eyes.

"What is wrong" I ask.

"Nothing" she says.

"Are you sure, because most people don't cry at 1 in the morning when nothing is wrong." I say.

She smirks. "My charm always works" I think.

"It's just, I'm so tired and I can't sleep through the night. I'm exhausted, Tobias" she whispers.

I remember the bottle of sleeping pills on our bedside table.

"Tris, maybe we should try the sleeping pills" I whisper. I have no idea how she will respond.

"At this point I will try anything." She whispers, defeated.

I carry her up to bed, and get her a glass of water, and grab the bottle of pills labeled 'melatonin'. I give her one and she washes it down with a gulp of water. Then we snuggle, in a perfect, still, quiet sleep.

Guys! Thank you so much for reading!! I should be able to post more now with School out! I tried to make this a lighter chapter! Please put ideas in the review! Stay awesome, possum!