Im Not Suppose to Love You The Way I Do ::~On Hold~::

Im Not Suppose to Love You the Way I Do .(Mindless Behavior)

Im Standing in the lights waiting for the judges to give me their response. I swear they take forever to come up with results. I know the way i danced was good. My friends said so themselves. If they don't hurry up though im gunna have to leave, because i have dance practice in an hour. Ok, not really a practice but... we just dance together. I dont know how to explain it. It just helps us.. Express ourselves.

Judge #1- Ok Zarah Teschler . ?

Zarah- Yes . ?

Judge #1- Now. Let me Tell You, Your a Very Talented Dancer But...

I knew what he was going to say. It was the same thing every judge has said to me for the past 5 months.

Judge #3- Sweety your dancing was-

Zarah- To Ghetto . ?

Judges-.....

Zarah- *laughs* Alright . Whatever .*walks out of the gym and walks down to Darions Garage*

I Cant believe this shit. Do they expect me to do . ? Dance like a damn Ballerina . ? *laughs quietly to herself* When are people gunna stop categorizing and just let me dance  !

Darion- Damn gurl You looked pissed .

Zarah- (sarcasticly) Oh Really . ? I Thought I looked FUCKING HAPPY . !

Q- Z Calm down with that . Just come on so we can start .

I Put my stuff down, and take off my shirt. Only leavng my in my sports bra and sweats. As Im putting my hair in a bun I look around and notice Randy isnt there.

Zarah- Wheres Randy at . ?

Q-*Damn she got a nice body*

Zarah- Q . ! Snap the Fuck Outa Whatever the hell Your thinkinq About and answer my question .

Q- Watch yourself Z .

Zarah-(rolls her eyes and turns towards Darion) Where's Randy at . ?

Randy- Right here Baby girl . ! (gives Zarah a hug)

Zarah holds on tight to him sort of afraid to let him go. You never know what could happen on the streets. On minute you think life is perfect the next your laying on the ground with your life draining out of you.

Randy-(whispers in Zarahs ear) we can talk while we are walking home aliright . ?

I Nod tears stinging behind my eyes.

Darion- iight Damn enough lovey Dovey shit and lets start . !

I let out my anger the only way i know how. Dancing. When me and Darion are done krumping i sit on the hood of Darions car watching Randy and Q go at it . I Love watching them krump. The way they pop their chest out and make their body move. In a way it turns me on. I nod my head to the beat keeping my eye on Randy. We've been bestfriends since.. forever. He was their for me when my Dad was murdered, and ever since then we've been tight. I see him sort of as a little brother but he sees me as a little sister. I guess wich ever one is in trouble is the one thats the oldest.

Q- Z come here and dance wit me.

Zarah- Im good.

Q- Excuse me . ?

Zarah- I Said. IM. GOOD.

I Could tell I hit a nerve and so did Randy.

Randy- Zarah just go up there.

Zarah- I Dont want to. I dont feel right dancing with him.

Randy- Zarah please.

I Saw the desperate look in Randys eyes. Sort of like He was scared. I didnt pay attention to it though. I just got up and started dancing with Q.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

We dance for another 2 hours and then me and Randy grabbed our stuff to go.

Q- Z lemme Holla at You for a Sec.

I Looked at Randy.

Randy- Its ok I Can wait. 

I Walk over to Q and he takes me into a more private area. Being back her brought this sick feeling to my stomach. Kinda like that feeling you get when you sense something bad is gunna happen, or your nervous. 

Q- I Dont like the way you talked to me earlier when you asked me to dance.

Zarah- Well.. I didnt wanna dance with you.(POV I know what you did to Stacy)

Stacy Was my bestfriend. She used to dance with us & she sorta teased Q. I think she went over board with it because one day Q took her into the back room & she came out with her face red. She made us run all the way to my house and did talk until we got to my room.

~=FlashBack=~

Stacy Comes running out of Darions Garage

Stacy- Zarah lets go.

Zarah- Hey what ha-

Stacy- I SAID LETS GO . !

We walk back to my house. Actually, we ran back to my house. I Unlocked my door , she ran into my room, and i ran in after her she closed the door, locked it, and burst into tears. I stood there and stared at her. Not knowing what to do.

Zarah- Stacy whats wrong . ?

I Was scared. I hoped what I thought was wrong. Stacy Was a sweet girl an the thought of something like that happening to her made me sick. She tore off her purity necklace and threw it at the wall.

Zarah- Oh my God Stace .

Stacy- He made me Zarah. I didnt do anything to him .

I started crying to.

Zarah- Stace-

Stacy- I DIDNT DESERVE THIS . ! I NEVER ASKED FOR HIM TO RAPE ME . ! I WASN'T DOING ANYTHING WRONG . !

I had no words to say. I dont think she expected me to.

~=Flashback Over=~

I Shuddered at the memory and wonder what ever happened to her. I haven't seen her since.

Q came up to me and pushed me against the wall .

Q- Bitch Im Talkinq to you . !

I Tried to break free but he didn't budge an inch . I started to panic but i knew i had to calm down.

Zarah- Get off me Q .

Q got closer to me. Pressing is chest against mine. He inhaled deeply and kissed my neck.

Zarah- Randy's outside waiting for me. If i Dont come out he's gunna come in here. If he see's you hes gunna kill you.

Someting in Q's head seemed to click and he let go. I Ran out and grabbed Randys arm. 

Randy- Zarah . ?

I Just kept running, dragging Randy with me. He kept trieing to talk but I didnt hear him. I kept thinking of Stacy . What happened to her almost happened to me. The thought of how close i was to getting raped made me stop and throw up.

Randy held my hair out of my face. I started crying.

Randy- Shhhh I got You Z .  I wont let anyting happen to you dont worry.

He walked me into my room. He sat on my bed and waited while I went to Brush my teeth, take a shower and change.

I walked back into my room with sweats on and one of Randys old t-shirts. He was watching Spongebob and I smiled. I climbed on my bed, under my covers and cuddled against Randys chest. He kissed my forhead, turned off the lights & the tv and held me until I went to sleep. He didnt ask me about what happened wit Q anymore , and I as glad. But I knew tomorrow he was going to be ready for some answers and I wasn't ready to give them.