Stuck with me

Baby eyes

"EEEEEHHHHH"
Screeched Trè Cool.
"What?" Replied his husband Mike, Green Day's bassist.

"I-I'm pregnant." Cried Tré
"WHAT? AND YOU TELL ME THIS NOW?"
"Yes. And oh!" Tré slapped his hand on his belly and lurched forward in pain.
"Tré!" Mike exclaimed in alarm.
"The baby is coming now!!" Tré screamed as he ran into the bathroom and plotted on the toilet.

"Stay away Mike I don't want you to see this!" Tré said as he reached over and shut the door.
"AAAHHH!" Tré wailed.
Mike began pacing and biting his finger nails outside the bathroom, he could not believe Tre was pregnant. How is that even possible?
After 30 minutes he knocked on the door, "Tré? Are you alright?"
No response.
"Tré?"
"Uuhg " Tre whimpered.
"I'm coming in!" Mike then slowly pushed the door open and he gasped.

Tré was holding a baby and it had a gigantic head.
"Oh my- he's beautiful" Mike whispered tearing up.
Mike crouched next to his husband and they both looked at their baby.
"What is his name?" Mike asked.
"Let's call him Billie Joe." Tré replied stroking him.
"Billie Joe...I like that." Mike said.
Just then the baby snapped his eyes open and screeched,
"I WILL KILL U ALL AND FEED YOUR ROTTING CORPSES TO THE CORN CHILDREN!"

"Holy meniscus! Tré something is wrong with the baby!" Mike yelled.
"Aww he's just like me." Cooed Tré.
"Hell no! We need to do something I mean just look at his head...wait a minute he kinda looks like Donald trump..."

"I AM DONALD TRUMP
YA BULGING BASKETCASE!"

"Awwwweeee he knows Basketcase!" Tré said rubbing the babies head.
"Stop doing that Tré it's creepy." Said Mike.
"But he's my baby!" Replied Tré. Just then he began to sing Basketcase to the baby.
"Do you have the time, to listen to me whine about nothing and everything all at once?"

"NO." the baby said.

"Oh hunny, don't be a fuss." Said Tré.
"FUCK YOU!" The baby hollered.
"Billie Joe!" Yelled Mike.
"Now now Billie watch your language!" Said Tré
"MY NAME IS NOT BILLIE IT IS DONALD TRUMP AND WHY THE HELL AM I A BABY?"

"Mike I think he's hungry will you go out and get some McDonald's? Preferably a happy meal for the lad. Oh and get me a Big Mac."
"Of course, anything for you ice tray." Mike replied.

"GRAHHHHH WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON!?" The baby screamed.

"Aw sweet heart your daddy is going to go and buy you some McDonald's calm down now." Tré whispered as he stroked his little chin.

"I DONT WANT MCDICKS I WANT ANSWERS!"

"In time my love, in time."

Tré then got up from the toilet and took his newborn into the living room.
"Ah this is more suitable for us eh?" Asked Tré.
The baby didn't reply.
Tré let out an exhausted sigh and he sank down into the cushiony sofa.
"Now that we are cozy shall we watch some Netflix?" Tré asked as he swaddled Billie Joe.
"NYAH!"
"Okey doki" Tré replied. "Hmm what movie should we watch?....."

Donald trump stared at Tré in such an angry expression he was surprised that his head didn't explode.
"Oooh 50 shades of Grey! Yes, we'll watch this"

Donald trump harumphed and wiggled around in tres lap trying to get out of tres grasp. He absolutely did not want to watch this shitty disgusting movie.