Live In The Moment

Live In The Moment- Chapter 1

"Good bye Annabel Fay Miller, darling, I'll always love you don't forget that, okay?" Tears ran down my face as my mother stood in front of me, her bags packed laying behind her close to the front door

"Please don't go" I cry out sobbing

"It's going to be okay" she wipes my tears from my face and pulls me into a tight hug

"Tell Bubby that I love him okay?" She let go speaking about my oldest brother Anthony, he was upstairs right now putting Angelica, my baby sister to bed

"And don't forget to give these to your siblings and dad" she pulled out folded papers with everyone's names written out and put them into my shaky hands

I didn't want to let her go, why did she have to leave? Did I do something wrong? What happened.

"Mama please" I tried begging again my voice cracking in between words

She shook her head, stood up, turned around, picked up her bags and walked out of the door.

I ran out after her.

"Please mom!" I screamed as she pulled out of the drive way

"Don't leave!"

"Mom!" I screamed "Mama" "Mom!" I kept shouting hoping she would stop the car but it didn't, it kept going like she couldn't hear me.

"Come on Annabel" Anthony walked out of the house his cheeks stained red from tears Andrew closely behind him but I didn't see Angelica

I walked closely to my brothers and we pulled each other into a hug.

"Why'd she leave" I whispered

We all went silent no one knew what to say.

----
I sat up breathing hard. I looked over to my night stand. 2:40. Damn. I grabbed my phone and logged in, instantly going into the snapchat app. I opened some streaks, replying to a few as well before setting my phone back down. I turned on my lamp and sat all the way up. I opened my side drawers and pulled out a piece of paper. The same piece of paper my mom left me two years ago. I held it in my hands, not completely sure if I wanted to open it or not and read it for the billionth time just in the past two months. I kept re reading my name on the front in her cursive hand writing that is now faded. Annabel Fay Miller.

"Why not" I mumbled to myself un folding the old paper carefully like at any moment it could disintegrate and disappear from my hands

I stared at it not reading the words written on it yet.

"Hey" Andy says as he appeared at my now slightly opened door

"Hi" I nodded into his direction keeping the paper firmly in my hands

"What's that?" He asked sitting next to me on my bed

"Moms note" my voice barely a whisper

He got up without a word and walked out of my room. I watched him as he left, he didn't seem mad or upset. Why'd he leave? I left it alone and began to read the lined paper that was stapled to another.

"My dearest Annabel Fay Miller, I know you don't like to go by Annabel and you like Fay better. I want you to know me leaving is and will never be your or your siblings fault. I simply had to leave, get away. I want you to know that I love you, always and forever.-"

I looked up from where I was at on the paper and seen Andy back into my room, this time with his own paper clutched into his hand. We met eye contact. He walked towards my bed and sat down. He opened his own old paper, that looks the way mine does, over used and dusty. As he read his I continued to read mine.

"And forever. I know you are going to do amazing things when you grow up and become an amazing dancer you've always dreamed of. You've grown into an amazing young woman and I'm sad to say I won't see you when you become a beautiful adult. Please take care of your dad for me, I know he doesn't need much help and I know he has and will have it all under control. He has so much love for you kids I wouldn't doubt it for a second that he wouldn't do anything for you guys. Be there for Anthony and Andrew I know you always are you guys are a perfect trio. And please take care of Angelica, always be there for her, show her what I can't. I love you so much Annabel Fay Miller."
-Love Mom

I folded the paper back up and put it back into the draw like I never touched it. I looked over to Andy, he was now on his second paper that was stapled. I sighed and laid my head on his shoulder closing my eyes. We never read each other's paper. The only persons paper I've read was Angels, she was three back then and wanted to know what it said, although since she was young I left some things out that she can read when she's older. Once I heard him sigh I opened my eyes again to see his paper folded not so neatly sitting on my bed next to him. I looked to the clock on my night stand.

"It's 3:30" I announced my head still laying on my brothers shoulder

"Yeah"

"You tired?" I ask neither of us moving

"Not really" he shrugged making my head bounce up

"Wanna watch t.v?"

"Sure." I lifted my head and walked to my tv that sat on the wall across from my bed grabbing the remotes and turning it on

Before I began channel surfing I turned it down so I wouldn't wake anyone. Angels room is next to mine on my right and Anthony's room is across from hers leaving my dads all the way down the hall and Andy's next to Anthony's. I sat back down on my bed scooting all the way to the wall so my back was leaning against it. Andy did as well so he was sitting next to me, he grabbed the remotes out of my hand. I was to tired to protest so I let him search through all the channels to find something to watch. I began to yawn waiting for him to pick something.

"Come on Andrew, how long does it take to find something" I whine sinking farther down into my bed so I was laying

"Patience child" he chuckled

"Patience? I've been waiting for seven min-ooh Suit Life Of Zack And Cody" I whisper shouted cutting myself off

He clicked on it and Dylan and Cole Sprouse's teen faces popped up on my television.

We sat there for five different episodes of the show before it ended and Hannah Montana came on.

"Okay Fay, I'm gonna go to my room and try to sleep" Andy announced pushing himself off my bed

"Huh? Okay" I lifted my head

"Night" I added

"Night" he whispered as he slipped out of my room

I looked over to my clock for the third time, 4:56. Should I even try to sleep? Yeah it's now 4:56 on a really early Saturday morning and we didn't have much going on besides Angels peewee soccer practice but that's not till 3:30. I decided that if I fell asleep I fell asleep so I continued to watch Hannah Montana.