Living With One Direction

Chapter Twenty-Three

 I followed Louis inside the arena, thinking about my decision. I actually looked at the calendar on my phone and realized my birthday is soon. It's been nine months since I've been here. I never realized I've been here that long. It's actually one day before my birthday. I didn't tell anyone when it was, so I'm hoping they don't find out. I pulled out my phone just to make sure. April 16, 2012. I sighed, knowing that if I left, I wouldn't come back.

"Louis." I called, as soon as we got to the stage. He was just about to go on. He turned around, he had a pained expression on his face. It surely couldn't be from me, I couldn't possibly mean that much to him.

"Yes?" He asked, looking me straight in the eyes. I don't want to make him upset with what I'm about to tell him.

"Good luck." I smile, deciding not to tell him.

"Thanks." He halfsmiled, rearranging the headset a lady just put on him. In a flash, he was gone. I decided to go back to the hotel and pack my bags. I need to get out of here, and fast. 

"Hey Uncle Hal." I called.

He turned around to face me, "Yes?"

"I'm not feeling too well, think I could head back to the hotel?" I crossed my fingers behind my back.

He nodded, "Sure. I hope you feel better."

I sighed, knowing this would be the last time I'd see him. I took a cab back to the hotel, once again, watching the rain droplets race each other on the window. The first one was winning. I traced it with my index finger. The rain droplet was flying across the window. I know that's how I will be when I get on that plane. I will be flying across the ocean.

"Here we are." The cab driver said in a thick Australian accent.

"Keep the change." I said, handing him a fifty.

He nodded his head, "Thank you ma'am."

 It had gotten dark on the way here. I didn't realize how different the time zones were in Australia than America. I opened the door and slid out. I slammed it without looking, my eyes fixed on the hotel sign. The Radisson. My last night here. I walked inside and instantly smelled the fresh scent of baked cookies. I furrowed my eyebrows, where could that be coming from? I watched as a boy carried a tray of cookies over his shoulder. It made me think of Liam's twitcam, The Cookie Man. I was sure going to miss these boys. As I stepped onto the elevator, my mind wandered back to the times I shared with Harry.

I remember one time when I caught Harry was cheating on me, I ran off. I ran off into the streets and almost got hit by a car. Harry saved my life, but he accidently pushed me into a stump of a pole. It punctured my side, but Liam fixed me up.

There was that one time for Harry's birthday when I brought his mom there for him.

There were also little things we did together before going to the US. We did a couple of twitcams, went on dates and such. The elevator dinged and I walked out of it, towards my hotel room. I slid my keycard in and the green light beeped. I opened the door and it still smelled like a new car. I let the door shut behind me and turned on a few lights. I always hated being alone in the quiet. I pulled my dock out of my suitcase and plugged it into the wall. I sat my phone in it and pressed shuffle. Eyes Open by Taylor Swift boomed through the speakers. I sang along, thinking of The Hunger Games.

I grabbed my dirty clothes and threw them into my bag. "Everybody's waitin' for you to break down, everybody's watchin' to see the fall out, even when you're sleepin', sleepin', keep your ey-eyes open." I sang.

I zipped up my bag and threw it into the living room. I trudged towards the bathroom, grabbing my toothbrush and other toiletries. I put those in my other bag. I grabbed my laptop and sighed. I've been secretly taking grade 12 online. I wanted to get my diploma. I did not stay in school for 11 and a half years to let that go to waste. My phone changed songs and Please Dont Let Me Go by Olly Murs came on. I scurried over to it, it described my situation a little too perfectly. I clicked the nexy arrow and Please Don't Go by Mike Posner came on. I shook my head, is this a sign or something?

I clicked the next button once again and Give Your Heart A Break by Demi Lovato came on. I can't listen to a song with hearts and break in the same sentence. I clicked next and Next 2 You by Chris Brown and Justin Bieber came on. You've got to be kidding me? Niall and Liam sang this song on a Twitcam. I pulled my phone out of my dock and set it on the table.

I walked over to the cabinet and pulled out some hot chocolate. I quickly made it and sat down on the couch, reminiscing.

I thought of the interview when the lady was hitting on Harry and I told her off. I laughed, shaking my head. I remembered the time on Saturday Night Live, when we first told each other we loved each other. I remembered when Liam kissed me and broke mine and Harry's heart. I shook that thought out of my head. I remembered making up.. and losing my virginity to him. I shook my head again, I need to quit thinking. I drank the last bit of my hot chocolate and set it in the sink.

I grabbed a piece of paper and a pen. I thought for a second about what I should write. I bit my cheek and let my heart flow out through my hands:

Dear Harry,

Please know that I am not breaking up with you because I've lost my feelings for you. I love you and I know I always will. I just need some time alone. I'm still not over my family's death. I miss them more than anything. Don't bother following me, because I've made up my mind. I'll come back sometime, I'll skype you and text you and do whatever long distance friends do. Amber can stay, it's fine with me. I think there's something up with her and Niall.. haha.

 I love you.

Chloe

I grabbed my sweater off of the back of the couch. I grabbed my two bags and opened the door. I took one last look of the room and walked out. I pressed the down button and walked into the elevator.

"Number?" A young boy asked, I didn't bother looking at him.

"One." I replied, stiffly.

"Chloe." The familar voice rang through my ears.

I looked up and into the beautiful eyes of Adam.

"Oh hey." I smiled, the smile not reaching my ears.

"What's wrong?" He asked.

 "My time's up, going back home." I replied, pulling my suitcase closer to me.

"Oh." Adam said, watching me closely. "You're sure you're okay?" He asked, furrowing his eyebrows.

"No." I replied as the elevator dinged. I ran out of it, out of the hotel, and into a cab.

"Airport." I told him, out of breath. He nodded and turned the ignition on. No turning back now, I thought.

  The man turned the radio on, and Safe and Sound by Taylor Swift came on. I heard the close sound of thunder and rain started pouring. I looked up at the sky, it was turning grey. I leaned my head up against the window, trying to clear my thoughts. It was no use, Harry's face was there in my mind.

I closed my eyes, trying to sleep. Harry's face flickered through my dreams, he was crying and biting his lip.

"Chloe.. I love you." He cried. He was fading.

"Come back!" I yelled, trying to grab his hand. I reached him and my grip loosened and he fell. I let him go.

If you love something, set it free. If it come's back, it was meant to be. 

In this case, I've been set free, but I don't think I'll ever come back.