The Many Shades of Ella's Hair

Chapter 2

I woke up in a blind panic. Then realizing, I was in bed my breathing slowed. Exhaling through my nose, I got up lithely and one minute before it rang, I was standing, and so when it did ring, my hand slapped against my alarm clock on time, for once. In the bathroom, I brushed my teeth – staring at myself in the mirror, sullenly.

I didn't look too bad. My fringe had grown out slightly but I didn't need to shave, because it was still decent. I gave a grunt as I noticed the acne though, and I continued to brush harder.

Then in the shower, I leaned my head against the wall, feeling the hot water – jabs of it from the shower jets, in pronounced sprays, needling my back. I watched as the shower glass door, filled with steam, so much so that when my fingers lightly traced, I could see what I had made – a watery picture of a woman. And I watched, slowly, as it faded away – as if wiped by an invisible clean slate back to steam, as the rest of the glass door was.

I didn't know how long I stood there for, just lying on the door, my back to the shower, before someone started shouting. And then rapping ensued on the door. It was my mother – I knew this by the distinct shuffle movement of her slippers, I had bought for her on Mother's day and she hadn't taken it off ever since. It had been my little sister idea, Alice's idea. And it had been a good one – Alice, who had gotten my mother something else, passed the credit to me.

"Michael get out!" My mother said firmly, hitting her hand against the door as if I hadn't heard her already, "You're going to be late for school."

Reluctantly, my fingers fumbled to turn the shower off. My hair, was wet and curly from the steam that had risen as if to wash and wet it. I dried off quickly, shrugging into a shirt and some jeans, and my combat boots.

I clicked the door open. And once down, ate my cornflakes in silence, my hair still wet and uncombed, droplets dripping to my irritancy still down my dry face.

"Mummy we learnt how to tell the time in school!" Alice cooed, sitting next to me. Alice, of very practical nature, ate her bran flakes quietly when she had suddenly remembered.

"That's nice, lovely," my mother said, smiling softly, her red lip stick bright against the dark contrast of her skin. Her hair had been kept, pushed back by a bandana. Here steely eyes froze to mine, where I was half-heartedly going through my sugary ,diabetes- giving own bowl of confectionary cereal.

"What did you do on the weekend Noel?" she asked, solemnly.

"A few friends," I said, looking up dejectedly. Got smashed.

She nodded, lips pursed. I didn't know how she always made that face, like she was sucking on a lemon but she did it, right now. A hesitation, behind her not speaking, a way of showing me she didn't believe me. "Did you see Clara?" she asked, eyes lighting up at recognizing one of my friends. Maybe she did believe me. It wasn't a lie, after all but it wasn't even half of the truth. Her lips twitched into an impossible smile. "She's a very sweet child."
Clara, my girlfriend. Once, was my girlfriend. But my mother didn't know that. I had seen her – and then I'd left. But I remembered being in t he moment – everything crystallized, clear and the atmosphere steamy and stuffy. And I could hear the palpitations of my heart, like an incessant drum, deafening. And then her, with her new boyfriend – well, I suppose not new because they had been together while we were together, so old other boyfriend. And it took everything in me – not to scream at her, or do anything.

"Yeah I did see her," I said vaguely.

"Well, how is she?" my mother perked, sipping some of her coffee, some of the lip stick smudging on the white cup.

"Alright?"I shrug, because I didn't know myself. I took one last bite, and then got up to put in the kitchen.

"Alright?" my mother repeated, smiling naively. Alice, passed me a small look, a wave of sympathy directed in it. How did Alice know we had broken up?

"Are you seeing her again this week?" my mother said, after a while. I set the bowl down on the marble table, next to the sink. The sink was next to the stove, and everything adjoined was in the kitchen, in full view.

"Probably not," I said, tiredly. I ran through the option in my mind – either I could tell my mother, but then she would gasp and ask for the details, so exhausted, I opted to following through with this charade.

"Mummy, it's 4:30 isn't it?" Alice asked cheerily. Her eyes were on mine, and I could see she was trying to distract mum, noticing my misery. I passed a small grateful glance at her. She acted dumb, but that she understood exactly what was going on, even though my mother – much more older, and wiser, did not.

"Yes it is kiddo," my mother smiled at her, proudly.

"Don't you want a ride?" my mother called out, as I walked past her and to the front door.

"No thanks," I called, shutting the door.