Stay in your lane

Chapter 2: Routine

I slowly open my eyes, I feel tears on my cheeks and sweat on my skin. It was all just a dream, a dream of the horrible night that has been returning to me for three years now. I wish I could dream of something else, but my mind likes reminding me that my brother is gone and I barely did anything to stop it from happening. I look at the alarmclock on my desk, it's 4 am might as well get up now. I pull the covers off me, step out of bed and turn on the lights. I see the picture of me and my brother on my closet. He has a big smile on his face just like me, two smiles unaware of the future. When I was younger I didn't understand why everyone would call him useless and disgusting, because to me he was the same as everyone else except he spoke with his hands instead of his mouth. But now I understand why everyone would say that, because he would never be able to be part of this shitty work obsessed society. Instead of trying to learn his ways and accept him, they remove him from society. I walk to my closet and open it. I pick my only pair left and one of my brother's old t-shirts, because the three of mine are all dirty. I put on my clothes and look in to the mirror. My black curly hair is messy as always. I walk out of my room to the kitchen. I grab a glass and fill it with water. I look through the kitchen-cabinets and fridge to hopefully find something to eat that isn't crackers, but I only find the same old crackers. I take a seat at the kitchen table with my cracker and my water. The kitchen looks as empty as always without my parents and brother. My parents have not come back from work in three weeks and I've slowly ran out of food in those three weeks, even though I didn't eat a lot. If it wasn't for the fact that I get food at school, I would have probably died. I'm already very thin and if we even had food it was most of the time a very small amount. I finish my food and I start to get ready for school. Brushing my hair, cleaning my face with already dirty water etc. When I'm done I lock the front door of our small apartment, grab my jacket and walk back to my room.