Dream Journal

June 30th - Lucid Dreaming (WTF)

I have never ever EVER had a dream like THIS before despite my hundreds of past dreams. Before I begin discussing this dream, here is some context that will be relevant in story.

I am a Christian who believes in the God described within the Bible. For the past week, I have been interning at an educational nonprofit that involves me working with little kids.

Yesterday, my parents left for while and asked me to do the cat litter. I never did, telling myself I'd do it before I went to bed. Eventually, I had procrastinated too long and really, REALLY wanted to go to sleep. I laid on the couch, closing my eyes, entering a half asleep state. My mom walked in and told me to put my brother to bed before midnight, which was about 40 minutes away. I faded in and out of partial sleep this time, occasionally checking my phone clock to see what time it was. Meanwhile, my other brothers were a couple rooms away, loudly watching a rated R war movie.

Eventually, it came time for me to put my non-movie-watching brother to bed, so I sleepily got up and did it. I remembered the cat litter, but felt too tired to do it. I remembered that my stepdad said he planned on waking up early, so I set an alarm for even earlier at 5 AM, procrastinating to wake up early to do it before my parents awoke and realized I didn't do it.

As I laid down to sleep, I thought about my procrastination towards the cat litter. I remembered what the Bible says about doing everything you do like you were doing it for Jesus Christ himself (Colossians 3:23). I weighed my options: get up, feeling terrible, and do the cat litter half-awake, or simply stay in bed. I decided to stay in bed. My inner voice kept whispering, But would you really make Jesus wait until morning for a command your mom commanded you to complete before she came home, which she already has?  

My other inner voice replied, Well, as long as I still get the job done, right...? 

You're going to regret this. You're going to repent for this later, saying you wish you'd never done it, and that statement will probably be a lie because you're consciously making this action right now, fully aware of your wrongdoing.

I've slid by with worse actions and I really don't want to get up. 

When you sin like this, it's opening a door for something bad to happen!

That's a risk I'm willing to take...

Despite all this internal discussion about tiredness, I found the energy to get up to turn off a night light AND get a drink of water. The bright light from the kitchen began to give me some energy, but I shook it off, determined to go to sleep despite this. My inner voice whispered, Look at this newfound energy! You should do the CAT LITTER for God! I ignored it.

I went back to bed, rolling over, falling asleep to the sound of gunfire and screams from the movie. The noises flowed through one ear and out the other. It was just past midnight.

xxx

As with most dreams, the memories tend to be scattered. I was simply enjoying my typical random dreaming when I suddenly realized, as I walked about, that I was dreaming.

This has only happened once before to me. The first time I realized I was dreaming, which was a few years ago, I immediately spawned cannoli (Sicilian pastries; look them up), happily devouring them. A bunch of girls showed up to help me eat them. Afterwards, I thought to myself, Oh! If I am dreaming, I can probably wake myself up! At that point, I squinted, straining myself, not really contemplating whether or not I wanted to wake up-- and then immediately woke up, a bit disappointed I didn't do more with my dream power.