i think you're beautiful - phan

I Think You're Beautiful (Phan) 1/1

Phil POV

The bus pulls up to my stop. I get on, and sit in my usual seat. I always sit alone. No one sits beside me because no one really likes me. Frankly, I'm not fond of them either. It's better this way. This is the way it's always been.

One row from the back, on the left side. Window seat. Not that it matters, no one will sit beside me anyways. And that's okay. I look out the window, zoning out. I stare at the trees, and different coloured cars as the bus moves down the street, stopping at certain points to pick people up.

Then I hear his laugh. It pulls me back to reality. I look up, peeking through my fringe to see Dan Howell laughing with his friend, who always gets on this stop with him. He sits two rows in front of me, as usual. He takes the window seat, as usual. He brushes his dark brown bang away from his chocolate, almost hazel-Amber eyes, as he laughs at another joke cracked by his friend. I smile to myself, enjoying his smile as he turns to his friend.

He looks back at me, and I'm sure he's caught me staring. I send him a small smile, and he sends one back my way. I've never talked to Dan before, but I wish I could. He turns away as his friend tries to catch his attention. He laughs again.

When his friend stops talking, he stares out the window like me. I can see his reflection through the window he's looking through, he looks sad. His eyes look lost, and his smile is now a line.

I think he's beautiful.

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The weather's getting warmer now. It's almost June. The bus comes to my stop, and I get on. I walk to my usual spot, no one bothering to look at me. There's only one person who's ever noticed me. And that's Dan.

Speaking of him, we arrive at his bus stop. He gets on with his friend and they sit in their usual spot, two rows in front of me. Unlike everyone else, he's wearing a long sleeved sweatshirt. He fiddles with his sleeves, pulling them down constantly. I watch him closely. He acts happy, but I can see through it.

The smiles he gives his friend are empty. His eyes are dull and his body is limp. He turns to see me staring as usual. I smile his way, he sends one back. But it's lifeless. Every day his smiles change little by little.

He turns back to his window, and stares out again. His friend is talking, but he isn't listening. He's watching life go by, with his big, sad eyes.

Nonetheless, I think he's beautiful.

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It's nearing the end of June now. School will be out soon. I'm not looking forward to it. I won't get to see Dan again for a while. It's not as if we ever talk or are friends, he's just the only one who knows acknowledges my existence.

The bus comes to my stop, and I get on. I go and sit in my usual spot, one row from the back. It's hot out so I'm sweating a little as I move my raven hair out of my blue eyes. I tap my foot impatiently, waiting to see the tall, dark haired boy get on the bus.

Just in time, the bus pulls up to his stop. I see him get on with his friend, a sad look plastered to his face. He looks my way, and I smile. He doesn't smile back. He looks at me, hard, and I see a tear in the corner of his eye. He wipes it with the back of his sleeve. Yes, he's still wearing long sleeves.

He looks away and takes his seat, 2 rows in front of me. His friend talks, but he doesn't laugh. He doesn't smile. He just stares into his lap, his skin pale and eyes red.

I see so much pain in his eyes as he stares out the window. He's broken.

But I still think he's beautiful.

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It's the last day of school. I get on the bus, and take a seat in my usual spot, 1 row from the back. I look out the window. Something doesn't feel right. Something's wrong.

We arrive at Dan's bus stop. Dan doesn't get on the bus. His friend does. His friend looks tired, eyes red from crying. He surprises me by walking passed his usual seat. He sits beside me instead.

"Phil, right?" He asks me, voice shaking. "Yeah.." I reply, not sure what to do. I know something is wrong now. With Dan. Something is wrong with Dan. The boy I think is beautiful.

His friend explains to me. Dan's parents found him dead last night. He shot himself. His friend tears up as he explains that Dan had written 3 letters. One for him and the rest of his friends, saying he loved them. One for his parents, saying he was sorry.

Dan's friend hands me the last letter, and walks away. It's directed to the me. A tear slips out as I read the letter.

"Dear Phil, the boy 2 rows behind me on the bus.

I think you're beautiful.

-Dan"

THE END

Hi I hope you liked that sorry it was sad. um so this is the first thing I've posted on here and I'm doing it through the app so I have no idea what I'm doing. How do you make it say completed and as tags and stuff like I'm so confused lol