This was originally posted on my Tumblr but I realized I never posted it here! So here's some fluffy Richie x Bill content for you guys. :)
Before he moved away and forgot, Richie Tozier remembered. In fact, he remembered a lot more than he'd like to. He remembered that day in the Barrens when everything changed; he remembered that foreign look on his friends' faces, a face that they as kids never had any reason to make. It was new but recognizable: that day they all shared a look of unmistakable fear as they recollected their horror stories of that thing haunting Derry. Richie remembered squeezing the air out of Bill Denbrough on the back of that stupid, wobbly bike as they sped away from the house on Neibolt Street, and he remembered how they'd both burst into tears the second they made it to safety.
Richie Tozier, the obnoxious but admittedly charming and sometimes funny ray of sunshine, had lost his composure in front of his best friend. Richie had been terrified, but realized that it was only partly because of the werewolf they'd just escaped. The other fear he felt was worse. It sank in his stomach like he'd swallowed a paperweight, it stung behind his eyes, and it squeezed at his lungs like he was drowning. It was the fear that Bill would think he was a big baby, afraid of everything and running from shadows. But even more than that, it was the fear that he couldn't protect his best friend and the fear that he didn't know if it was okay to love Bill a little differently than his other friends.
Yes, Richie definitely remembered that day as a turning point. He remembered going home and feeling what could best be described as lost for a good half hour as he paced around his room. He remembered thinking that, after everything that'd been going on recently, all the real scary stuff, wasn't it funny that he was most scared of himself? And he thought each day when he'd see his parents exchange a hug or a kiss that wow, they sure are lucky to be so happy. He saw them and he was scared, more scared than when he was running from that werewolf, so scared that he felt numb. He just couldn't quite place his finger on why, not yet.
But later that night, when he finally sank into his familiar, Richie-shaped spot on his mattress, he turned his radio on just loud enough to hear. He thought about his mom and dad and how normal they seemed, how happy, and he thought of the prettiest girl he knew but it didn't feel right. He didn't think it would ever feel right, even with somebody like Beverly Marsh who all the boys swooned over and all the girls were jealous of. His heart didn't flutter and his cheeks didn't grow hot when he talked to Beverly, so what was wrong with him? But then he thought about his best friend Bill Denbrough, and suddenly he felt sick and happy and miserable all at the same time. Bill who never got fed up with Richie's stupid comments, Bill who let Richie ride on the back of his beloved bike, Bill who saved Richie from werewolves and Bill who let Richie cry in front of him without saying a single mean word about it. Now that, that felt right.
But Bill was what everyone else called normal. Even Bill, who was the most compassionate and sensitive person Richie knew, would surely laugh at him for honestly thinking he was in love with a boy. How could Richie know that Bill was lying in his own bed thinking the same thing, sick to his own stomach and listening to the same radio station?
Richie realized he'd been zoning it out until now, but as he tuned back in he heard Buddy Holly's voice singing "Oh Boy." Oh boy was right.
