Spilt Poison

Chapter One

03/01/11

"Adanna, you do nothing for us around here!" My mother yells practically in my face as I keep my gaze on the wall, as per usual. 

"I and your father have done everything that we can for you; and you have done nothing but throw it back in our faces. We have had enough. You need help, Adanna. Proper help." She begins loudly and then quietens towards the end of her short lecture. 

I have a thousand buttons, and she always known which one to press. 'You need help.' No I don't. I don't need any ones help. I need people, I need a proper life which you are not giving me! I wish I could make these words escape my lips, but they don't. They stay locked away. Locked away; just like I am. 

I knew that this day was going to come. I have always known it. I just didn't think that it'd come so soon. They have given up on me so quickly. They don't want anything to do with me. I don't need help; they have just had enough of me being me. The lonely, broken girl that I am. I am not saying that I'm the best sibling or the best daughter, but I'm certainly not the worst. Am I? No. I can't be.

"Missy will come for you in forty five minutes." She says too calmly. And who the hell is Missy?

And finally, after literal years of not speaking, the first three words I have spoken in a long time escape my lazy lips. "Who is Missy?" I ask and my mother, after beginning to walk away turns around immediately; in shock I presume. I'm pretty shocked too and I feel that the best option is to turn away; so I do. I have not heard my voice since I was 13 years old. I'm now 16; coming upon 17. Great. 

"She's your new care taker. Guardian if you like." What? Is she being serious?! I don't want a care taker! In fact, I don't need a care taker?! I assume my anger is obvious as my mum slowly closes the door. I assume that the only reason that she is being calm about this is because she is finally getting rid of me. Finally escaping from her as-'good-as-death' daughter. 

She knows what I am like when I'm angry; although I have not been angry in a while. I stand up, closing the gap between my mother and I. I am close to her now. Very close. "You have never even tried with me. You have done nothing but watched me deteriorate. You can't be bothered with me anymore. You have only ever cared about Ollie. And you are not my mother. And he is most definitely not my father." I say through gritted teeth before pushing her out of the way and leaving the room, storming up the stairs. I grab all of my most important things. I am sure wherever they want me to go; it's better than here. Anywhere is. 

I was wrong. So very wrong. 

6:15pm. 

When all hell broke loose. 

I try to escape the tight grasp of the man leading me through this forever darkening building, full of pale faces staring at me in utter silence; like they've seen it all before. Like they see it all the time. I can't be- I mean, they can't have brought me here? Can they? I am not that bad?

"Get of off me!" I scream, lashing every limb I could at the people surrounding me, but it's hopeless. They soon enough have my arms behind my back and my legs are soon weak. I'm not good on my legs. Never have been. Never will be. I don't eat and don't exercise, therefore they do me no good. 

Finally, after what seems like hours of being dragged through never-ending corridors or continuous darkness, Im shut into a dull; depressing room. It's a literal cell. If they plan on 'helping' me; then this certainly isn't the way to do it. Idiots. Taking me away from my sister and everything I know and throwing me into a cell of darkness. If anything, this will make me worse. 

I scream loudly, kicking at the door which seperates me and and another row of people who I assume have the same issues as me. Loneliness. Sadness. I could go on forever and ever. But I won't. There is no point in telling you how I feel. No one will simply understand how I feel. I hurt to much. Like someone has wounded me badly and not mended me. 

"Help her, you idiots!" I hear an unfamiliar voice call from another cell. Unusually, I'm instantly calming. My breathing slows a little and my head clears a bit. I can't see who said it. I can't hear them speaking again. Was I just imagining it? I must have been. There is no one to be seen standing at the front of there cell. Damn; you have got it bad, Adanna. 

I fall back onto the surprisingly comfortable bed, trying to catch my breath as it runs from me. I hang my head as I sit on the edge of the bed, my head in my hands. No tears fall. No emotions show. No frowns appear. No nothing. Just the usual stuff, then. I am never going to change. Never ever. 

"Lights out." I hear a kind spoken women call through to me. What? We have a curfew?! This is insane. This is a prison. This is NOT a place for helping people. Did you see them?! They all look awful. They are all broken. We are all broken. None of us are ever going to be mended. None. Why do they even bother. 

I lay down on top of the covers, clasping my hands over my rising and falling torso. I stare at the plain roof for a while before letting my eyes flutter shut. I let out a deep breath, shaking my head. Am I really here? Is this all a nightmare that I was always bound to have? Is this all just to warn me that if I don't start acting better, this is what it'll really be like? I mean; they will let me out tomorrow. Huh?