looking for a star. -jahseh onfroy-

chapter four.

Jahseh.

I woke up around 11 because I couldn't sleep. Normally I would just tell the bitch to get an abortion. But this wasn't just some bitch. This was Indya. I've loved her since we were kids. It slipped my mind earlier, but after she left, I got to thinking and I finally I realized why she looked so familiar. That was my first love. I felt so bad, I just ruined her career, if not, put it on hold for a while. I did the only thing I could think of.

"Where you goin vro?" Ski asked me.

"I'll be back. I'ma go see how Indya's doin." I grabbed my keys and drove to CVS, where I picked up a test and some flowers. I don't care if she's pregnant or not, I will love her till the mf day I die.

When I pulled up at her house, I got out and immediately saw someone upstairs peek through the blinds. They must have seen me, because they quickly closed the gap and when I got to the door, I heard it lock. I rang the doorbell. A few minutes passed and nobody answered, so I knocked. By the time she gave up and answered the door, it had been raining for the past hour. I honestly would've waited til 12 am for her, but I guess I got lucky. I heard the door unlock before it swung open.

"What do you want?" Her arms were folded. She then saw that I was soaked. She didn't say a word as she motioned for me to come in. She grabbed a towel out of the fresh pile of laundry sitting on the couch and handed it to me. "You're lucky my mom isn't home, or I would've given in a lot sooner than I did. And this doesn't mean I've forgiven you."

"Look, I know you're mad, but I did some research, and it turns out that you really only have a 25% chance of getting pregnant." I said calmly as I dried off.

"DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW THIS COULD AFFECT ME X? DO YOU HAVE THE SLIGHTEST IDEA? CAUSE I NEED MONEY. AND MODELING IS MY FULL MOTHERFUCKING TIME JOB. WHAT THE HELL AM I SUPPOSED TO DO? CALL UP MY AGENT? 'HEYYYYY SO I WAS WONDERING IF I COULD DO A COUPLE MATERNITY SHOOTS HERE AND THERE' MY REPUTATION IS RUINED X. FOR GOOD. NOW IM JUST SOME MODEL SLUT THAT GOT KNOCKED UP BY XXXTENTACION" She breathed heavily. She rubbed her temples. "The one day I skip birth control. What the literal fuck. Why me?" She ranted under her breath as she paced back and forth on her living room floor.

"Jahseh." I stated, my voice unwavering.

"What?" She stopped pacing and looked at me with her hands on her knees, out of breath from yelling.

"That's my name. Jahseh." I said. Her eyes practically flew open.

"Last name."

"Onfroy" I answered. She shook her head in disbelief.

"No."

"Yes."

"But you look so-"

"Different? Yeah, I know. It's the tattoos. Anyways, I got you this." I handed her the test.

"Thanks. I'll be right back, I guess." She took it and jogged upstairs. That was awkward.

Indyamarie
I quickly unboxed it, my heart pounding and my hands shaking. After I was done, I washed my hands and set a timer before I went back downstairs. He was pacing nervously.
"5 minutes and we'll find out." I said. He sucked his teeth and started pacing again, this time faster. I sat down on the couch and watched him. After 2 minutes had passed, he got tired and plopped down next to me. He laid his head on my boobs and I was so worn out from yelling that I didn't care. I played in his hair as he was sound asleep. 3 minutes later, I woke up to the timer I set on my phone. I got up and pushed him off me.
"MOVE BITCH." I yelled as I got off the couch and ran up the stairs. I picked the test up off the bathroom counter and read the indicator under my breath. "One line is negative, two lines means positive. Okayyyy." I rubbed my eyes. I only saw one line. I ran down the stairs as fast as possible. I hopped on top of X and shook him to wake him up.
"X IM NOT PREGNANT LETS GOOOOOOOOOO."
I got up and started dancing around. When I looked back at him, he looked hurt. "I...um...didn't mean it like that."
"Sure you didn't. It's fine. Nobody wants to have my children anyways." He turned and walked out the door.
"Jahseh...wait." I called after him as I followed closely behind. He stopped in his tracks and turned around before grabbing my face and kissing me.
"Goodbye, Indya." He said. I quickly grabbed his wrists without hesitation. He was going to pull away, but I tightened my grip.
"If it means anything, I love you." I said. He turned around slowly.
"Sure. Sure you do. You know, that's what my ex said. I was in jail because of her." He yanked his wrists away from me. Tears threatened to fall down my face. I let them. I sulked and walked back inside and up to my room. It was only noon, but I slept anyways.
Jahseh
I got in my car and sped off toward Ski's house. Shit man, she got me feeling all kinds of ways. She really don't wanna have my kids. Got me hurt as fuck. I walked into Ski's house with tears in my eyes. I slammed the door shut behind me before I threw the flowers across the opposite wall. Just then, I got a call. It was from Indya. I reluctantly picked it up.
    "Hello?" I asked.
    "X...there are two lines. I'm pregnant." She said and I could practically hear the tears in her eyes. I was shocked.
    "I'll be over in a second." I mumbled into the phone. I hung up and raced to her house. I didn't even get a chance to knock before the door swung open to reveal her face, puffy from crying. I pulled her into my chest. We didn't say a word. I stood there and held her until she let go. "What are you gonna do?" I asked.
    "I don't know..." she managed, fighting tears.
    "You don't have to keep it if you-" She cut me off.
   "I'm keeping it." She stared blankly at me.
   "Look, I'm gonna be here for you whether you need me or not. I've loved you from the moment I laid eyes on you. The reason I'm like this is because you left. And I haven't been the same since. But I'll always love you. That is never gonna change." The fear and hopelessness in her eyes turned to relief and love in an instant. I picked her up bridal style and carried her to her room. I gently placed her in her bed and kissed her forehead before walking around to the other side of the bed and pulling the covers over both of us. I pulled her close to my chest and turned the tv on.
        "What do you wanna wat-" I didn't finish my question before I looked over to see her sound asleep. I played in her hair and listened to the content snores she was emitting.

A/N- I meant to finish this chapter when I got back from camp but I was reuniting with some old friends and then I started school three weeks ago and I've been so busy and ahhhhh I'm sorry❤️. Anyways, this was kinda a long chapter so that might make up for it, even a little bit. ALSO PLEASE VOTE AND COMMENT ON THIS CHAPTER CAUSE I GET HELLA VIEWS BUT NO VOTES/COMMENTS AND IT MAKES ME MAD but I still love y'alllll. gn vrooooos-<3