Last Three Years (Natsu x Depressed!Reader)

Chapter 22: Existence

((WARNING: Strong language is used in this chapter. Please read at your own discretion.))

"Shouldn't she be awake by now? It's been over two weeks.."

"Her body was damaged beyond belief. It's going to take some time for her to recover, if she even does... She's lucky to have been alive by the time you made it back. If it hadn't been for Wendy's healing magic, she would've bled out to death and died."

"I just don't understand why-"

"She's been through so much. You can just look at her and tell that much. It doesn't take a genius to look at her scars and figure out she self-harms."

"..."

You groan, deciding it was finally time to let them know you were awake. For the past hour you had laid awake with your eyes closed, listening silently to those near your bed talk.

"(Y/n)?! You're awake!" You open your eyes, staring blankly into the onyx eyes you knew so well.

"Get out of the way, foolish boy! Give her space to breathe." You recognized the one speaking as the lady who had healed you before, Porlyusica. "In fact, everyone out. I need to check her injuries." Natsu, Wendy, Gray, and Erza all filed out of the room. How nice of them to come and check up on you.

But where was Lucy? Not that I really care or anything.. maybe she was just busy.

"You've been asleep for seventeen days. In a coma actually. I wasn't sure you would wake up. Your body is strong, but your organs are weak." She began to take off the hospital robe, leaving you in your bra and underwear. She gently yet quickly unwinds the thick bandages wrapped around your stomach and chest.

"I know," You replied simply. You glance down at your bare arms and legs. They were vulnerable and uncovered for anyone to see.

That meant everyone finally knew. They had seen the carved messages on your skin from your old self. You had never intended for such private words to get out to anyone, but now it seemed there were lots of people who knew.

"How much longer will you hide the fact from them?" The doctor asked, looking at you with pitying eyes. You shrug with one shoulder, looking out the window. She begins to wrap fresh bandages around the injuries, securing them tightly with medical tape. The wounds throbbed with dull pain.

Despite them knowing about your scars and habit of self harm, there were some secrets you were still reluctant to tell them. Some secrets you still denied yourself.

"There's something else you should know. About your brother." You wanted to ask how she knew Saf was your brother, but no words left your mouth when you opened it.

"He passed away two days ago. I'm sorry." She truly did look sorry.

But that wasn't enough. No apology could bring Saf back.

A strange noise claws out from within your throat, and it takes you a moment to realize that you were crying. Dry, choking sobs pushed through your throat, sending violent tremors throughout your body. Fat tear drops plopped down from your cheek, wetting the sheets of the infirmary bed. "N..no....."

"He said to give this to you when you woke up," She said quietly, placing a sealed letter on the bedside table. She stood up, leaving you alone in the room with only your dangerous thoughts. With shaky hands, you reach out and grasp the letter, staring at the messy handwriting on the front. You were able to make out one word.

(Y/n).

A fresh wave of tears flow down your face as you clutch the letter to your chest. Raw emotions ripped at your heart, shredding the already torn pieces. It was on this day that you felt yourself take a back seat in your own life. No matter how hard you tried to steer your life in the right direction that led towards freedom and salvation, you always somehow managed to take a wrong turn and end up lost.