dear vikram barn, ♡ sidemen

♡ chapter one

"does anybody maybe happen to know how the hell to do this?"

-'Anybody Have a Map' from 'Dear Evan Hansen'

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Vikk sat up from his bed when he heard his obnoxious alarm go off. He reached over and turned it off, he forgot the clean white cast on his arm. He winced when he used that arm to turn of his alarm.

"Shit." He swore to himself

He quickly switched to the other arm and turned off his alarm. He got up from bed and started getting ready for the first day the school.

He's been dreading this day.

Vikk changed into a blue striped shirt with some plain pants. He sat on his bed with his computer infront of him and started on today's letter.

He stated at the blank document on his computer, he started typing:

Dear Vikram Barn,
Today's going to be an amazing day, and here's why,

He just stared at the document. He didn't know what to write.

Vikk has severe social anxiety. He's been going to a therapist for a few months and he recommended he write these letter to himself to "boost his self-confidence."

He cleared his throat and read aloud as he typed:

Dear Vikram Barn,
Today's is going to be an amazing day, and here's why, because today all you have to do is be yourself.

Vikk cringed at his own writing. "Also-confident-like-approachable-and-easy-to-talk-to-but-you-need-to-be-yourself-like-that's-the-number-one-thing-is-to-be-yourself." He rambled to himself

"Oh-and-don't-even-worry-if-your-hands-are-gonna-get-sweaty-for-no-reason-and-you-can't-make-it-stop-because-they're-not-gonna-get-sweaty-so-I-don't-even-know-why-you're-bringing-it-up-because-all-you-have-to-do-is-be-yourself."

Vikk always goes on these nervous rants when no one is around. He just talks to himself and acts as if someone is there and listening.

He took a deep breath before continuing on his rant to himself, "Seriously-don't-even-worry-about-because-it's-not-gonna-be-like-last-year-when-you-had-the-perfect-chance-to-talk-to-Tobi-Brown-after-the-band-concert-but-you-couldn't-because-your-hands-got-too-sweaty." He sighed at the memory of last year.

He remembered how he waited outside for Tobi to come out but, the boy was worried his hands got too sweaty. Vikk went into the bathroom and put his hands under the hand dryer in the bathroom but, that only made it worse.

He never got to talk to Tobi that night.

He looked back at the computer and quickly deleted the last sentence he wrote.

Tobi Brown is a young boy who goes to Vikk's school. He plays the clarinet in the band and is rather good at it. Vikk has had a crush on Tobi since freshman year but he never had the courage to go up to him and talk to him.

He was always scared his hands were too sweaty and that Tobi might think he's a loser.

Vikk kept staring at his computer, trying to figure out what to write next.