snowflakes and blizzards

save me.

S A V E  M E.

구해줘

note;
☼ this piece is a one chapter fanfiction and may be written as a book of its own when i complete my senior year.

☼ this fanfiction is boyxboy.

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lost, broken and fallen apart,
my head's underwater
and i am begging to breathe,
but my love,
would it not hurt less
if i simply stopped fighting at all.
—of words never said, and can never be—

the moon possessed a pulchritude that was difficult to string into words; it has craters and uneven surfaces and yet, the manner in which it conquers the jet black expanse of the night sky could leave every soul in awe. the moon glows in all its grandeur, putting any substance around it to shame, for even the million stars sometimes seemed to be mere spectators of the moon. the moon made him happy for he had been watching it since he was a kid and the globe of greyish-ivory became his comfort. park jimin had an indescribable love for the moon and constellations, and he could go on for hours on rambling about how these night sky wonders made the universe beautiful. he would make min yoongi watch the night sky with him, and every single time, yoongi would rather stare at the boy by his side whose ethereality surpassed everything else by a millionfold. yoongi was always at a loss of words when he was with him, and he lost count of the times he wanted to tell park jimin that his beauty spilled through the cracks of his face like the aurora borealis and he could not just watch the moon and the stars when jimin's eyes held the goddamned milky way in them.

but just as much as nights comforted and offered him solace, they were his greatest fears for they made him relive every tormenting memory and infiltrated his mind with the thoughts he so greatly wished to erase. it was different before yoongi, and now the monsters that he had let stay in his head would no longer leave. now, nights made park jimin want to live as much as they made him want to die, and this thought pricked at the very fibre of his being.

"y-yoongi?" a boy's quivering voice called out into the ubiquitous darkness that enveloped him, its deadly grip on the boy's small frame tightening with every passing moment, slowly suffocating him. suddenly, a dim shaft of light shined above him, and he instantly knew where he was. it was the same scene replaying itself in his head- it was as if he was constantly being dragged back there, and the very thought made his stomach churn; it sickened him. park jimin stood there, above a bottomless chasm, the voices in the dark taunting him. fall. he knew what would happen if he moved even the slightest of an inch, and he had spent countless sleepless nights begging for precisely that reality; his nightmare of a life would finally cease. but now, after having his soul drenched with a feeling of joy that he had never thought his existence was worth, after having his heart leap at the sight of a boy with mint green hair and a gummy smile that seemed to redefine the very wonders of the universe, he felt as if he was being weighed down by a multitude of emotions, throttling his thoughts to the extent he could hardly think. to leave or to stay.

he could feel shivers run down his spine as he stared at the tenebrosity that loomed around him- fear and trepidation seeped into his bones, and jimin could not shut the voices out of his head.

do the damned world a favour and jump, you useless kid.

"please. . i beg you

how can you not see it- how much of a burden you truly are.

. . . just leave

you hurt everyone around you. just end it, you've always wanted to anyway.