Did I Stutter? (Fike Fic)

2

+Firkle's Pov+

"C'mon.....I-I can..."

I can't stop shaking, I can barely keep the phone in my hand. I let out a frustrated sigh.

"Ugh....why is this so hard...." I groaned, laying back on my floor. I dropped my phone next to me, and it's light barely shined around my dark and dusty room.

I rolled to my side and wrapped my arms around a pillow, shoving my face in it and screaming as loud as I could.

          "This is so conformist..." I whined, throwing my pillow across the room. It landed with a small thud on the Terot cards Henrietta left here last week.

When she did my reading, it said stupid things like how I was feeling lonely or something. I couldn't stop thinking about Ike when it said that.

I can never stop thinking of him. His tall strong form, his soft raven locks, and his beautiful bright eyes.

I hate it. I hate thinking of him, I hate how he's in my head. I've grown up to think that people like him are scum, so why do I feel like this.

I scream in frustration again.

          "I hate that fucking Nick Jonas wannabe!!" I screamed out, grabbing my phone and throwing it at the wall. A dent was created in the wall, but my phone was secure.

          I huffed and gridded my teeth as I watched my phone carefully. The longer I stared at his number, the more calmed I got. I sighed and slid back down my wall, bringing my knees to my chest.

          "No I don't...." I sighed, picking up his note and reading it to myself again.

          "Call me! (XXX)-XXX-XXXX"
-Ike<3

School let out an hour ago, but I can't bring myself to press the call button. My palms are sweaty and I feel like I'm hyperventilating. I can't call him like that.

But....I don't want him to think I don't care....

I almost threw up in my mouth as I even thought about caring about him. Even if I do...

          I stood up and grabbed my phone, calling the number before I could back out again.

"I-I can do this..." I pep-talked myself.

          I shook more and more as I lifted the phone to my ear. My heartbeat quicken and I couldn't breath as it rang over and over and over....

          Click

          "Hello?"

          I took a deep breath before speaking.

          "H-Hi Ike...." My voice was timid, mostly because I could barely hear myself over my loud heartbeat.

          "Hey Firkle! You actually called!"

          "Yeah...." I'm just as surprised as he is... Oh geez, this is gonna be more difficult then I thought....

          "I-I mean yeah, y-you told me to, s-so...." He giggled at me, and I could feel my heart jump out of my chest.

          "Yeah, well sorry about leaving so fast, I just...um... I wanted to know if you wanted to study together for the geometry test. I've heard you have trouble in geometry so, I thought....w-well-"

          "Of course!!"

          Shit.

          "I-I mean! Yeah, y-yeah...th-that sounds good...." He laughed at me again. I could tell he was smiling which made my face warm up.

"Awesome, wanna study Thursday after school then? I would say tomorrow, but my dad needs my help taking care of some stupid stuff at the office."

My heart sank a little. It's Tuesday, so I have to wait a whole day 'til the study date. WAIT NO NO NO!

THIS IS NOT A DATE. Not in any way form or shape. I would never date a stupid godamn conformist roach!

"Uhh, Firkle? Ya' still there dude?"

Oh shit, I forgot I was talking to the roach...

I MEAN IKE!!

"YEAH!" I yelled out of panic. I flushed and scrambled to at least attempt to play it cool. "I mean th-that would be great!" I face palm. Just kill me now Satan....

I hear his laugh again. I feel like I get high off it, it's just so addictive.

          "Awesome! Okay, so I'll text you about it later, 'kay?"

"S-Sounds cool..."

          What's wrong with me, since when did I start saying 'cool'?

"Great!"

          "Yeah....Bye I guess..." I didn't want to stop talking to him, I just hate phone conversations with a burning passion. This is too awkward.

          "Bye Firkle! See ya' tomorrow!"

          "See ya'...."

          See ya'? Am I serious?

          I quickly hung up before I would want to shoot myself.

As the phone slowly dropped from my ear, I feel my body relax and I let out a relieved sigh. I recollect myself and realize what I did.

"I....I did it..." I smile like an idiot and closes my eye, laying back on my floor. My bliss lasted for a second before an obvious realization hit me. I cringed.

          "I'm so fucking conformist."