Sebastian Stan Imagines

Society's Mistake | S. Stan

Breath quickening as your feet continuously padded on the burning concrete, you ran like your life was depending on it. Also, due to the fact that you brought your current state to a lot of park-goers' attention. Simply scanning you, they quickly dismissed you as another person desperately attempting to rid the unwanted fat that occupied your body. Either way, those who gawked at you momentarily were the least of your problems. Your full attention on the pavement ahead of you, the music that distracted your ears and your thoughts.

Slowing down your pace from the painful side stitch that attacked your right side, the pain increasingly revved up, causing your jogging feet to begin walking. As many other runners flew past you, a chastising thought flooded your mind."Why'd you stop? The physician told you that the point of the pain was to keep going!" Although you wanted to listen to your motivating brain, the searing side stitch, uncontrollable sweating about your body, constant panting, and aching body told warned you otherwise.

Throwing your head back, you allowed the sports hat fail you in letting the sun come in contact with your beet red, moist face-- eventually walking left into the grass. Squatting, you placed your sweat soaked hands upon your thighs, practicing the breathing exercises you'd read online to relieve the burning sensation on your side. Suddenly, the impact of the run was affecting you; lungs feeling as though they were burning alive, throat dry from unintentionally holding your breath throughout the span of your run, your toes being squished to death from the running shoes you'd recently broke in, and the side stitch still hurting.

Feeling defeated, a tiresome sigh escaped your dry lips, the lack of water making you extremely thirsty. Though, the water was the last thing that crossed your mind; the first thought being your weight loss journey. You came so far, nine weeks in, eating healthily-- omitting processed foods and anything that included additive sugars, drinking an essential amount of water everyday, fixing your sleep schedule, and exercising daily. Even though your health was improving, your weight wasn't. You felt as though you were achieving little to any progress regarding your weight. Week in and week out, after you stepped off the scale, you felt that all of the hard work you put into that certain week was for nothing.

Your weight was always a problem. Only being thin when you were younger, but due to your genetics of a slow metabolism, all of those Gushers and Honey Buns soon caught up to you. Unaware of body image as a child, the care of eating healthily was none. Growing up into a changing society in which standards for woman started to heighten, you eventually opened your eyes on the topic of your body. Which had not fit your height, in fact, marking you as on the verge of obese. Throughout the years, the weight loss attempts did decrease some of the weight, bringing your level down to simply overweight. But it didn't help your self-esteem nor your confidence. The body you resented was always hidden behind an oversize graphic tee shirt and a pair of stretchy leggings. The body you resented hindered you from going outside often. The body you resented made your life a living hell. Feeling that you were trapped inside of the body you resented so much.

Tired of pitying yourself because of your body, you decided to schedule a doctor's appointment to get your health information regarding the journey, threw away any junk food, donated all of your clothes, and re-vamped your lifestyle. The determination brought you nine weeks in, yet you felt no significant change towards your weight and your body. Not to mention you'd look at your reflection in the mirror daily, seeing little to any change. Thighs still chunky, belly still thick and floppy and an array of other characteristics still visible to you. You just wanted to stop, eat a whole pie of pizza and binge watch tons of movies.

Though, you've come too far to just stop, to give up. Yeah, it would feel good in the moment... but those horrible eating habits'll slowly crawl its way back to your diet, and you surely didn't want to gain more weight while you were trying to lose it.