The Compass to your Heart ~ Baekyeol ~ fanfiction

Chapter 4

Sehun's POV

It's never enough.

Their love isn't enough.

No one's love is sufficient.

That's what I've always felt.

My necklace never glowed so I thought I was doing something wrong.

It never glowed until I saw Luhan.

When his small head turned, my necklace burned.

It can't be.

I can't be gay.

Especially after what happened with Tao.

Luhan's POV

Sehun thought it would be fair to tell me that he wasn't into guys.

He was the school known homophobe.

No one knew why but he couldn't stand homosexuals.

Which is a huge problem since I was a guy.

*ding*

My phone vibrated so I checked, one new message.

Sehun

I'm at school now

Meet me outside near the benches by the park

He didn't hate me, but he could never love me.

We agreed to be friends and that's what tormented me the most.

"I'm here."

"Hey," he sighed and pat the seat beside him.

"So what is it?"

"Did I ever tell you why I was homophobic?"

"No," I turned at looked at him.

"Well, in grade school I had this friend, a friend I did everything with.

Our parents were friends and when they returned to Korea from China I spent every day with him.

Eventually, he fell in love with me.

We were in seventh grade when he first told me.

I flipped out at him because I didn't know how to handle it.

He was already bullied enough and watching me flip shit over his love, was the last straw.

I could only imagine how he felt.

Every fibre of his being being ripped out at every word I screamed.

I regret it so much, even to this day because I was never able to apologize.

After I ran out of his room.

He hung himself.

I still can't forgive myself because then, I also liked him.

I was just too scared of admitting it.

I fell into intense depression and was hospitalized until the start of eight grade.

When I went to go see his family, his mom handed me a letter.

They didn't know what pushed him.

They didn't know I pushed him to his death."

After saying this Sehun started sobbing.

I reached out my arms and brought him into my embrace.

Sehun's POV

I liked Luhan.

Even more than I have ever liked anyone.

But I couldn't do it, I owed this much to Tao.

Loving me only meant heartbreak.

I've been slapped, beat up multiple times by girls or their boyfriends.

I felt like no one could ever love me enough so after awhile I pushed them all away.

Of course some took it better than others.

And so far, Luhan hasn't given up on me.

Even after all these months of pain I caused him.

I'd always text him purposely to walk in on me with a girl.

And his number was the only one I memorized and called when I was drunk beyond compare.

"Tao loved you," he pat my head.

"I'm sure right now, he would want you to be happy.

If you were his most important person he would want you happy."

I shook my head and got up.

I slipped Luhan's small hand into mine and dragged him.

"Where are we going?" He stumbled.

"You'll see."