forever won't wait

torn wings

The lights were dim as Taehyung stepped into the dingy little apartment. Three sets of eyes landed on him, and he waved off their questioning looks.

"Found this kid today, looked like he had nowhere to go. I was gonna bring him here, but he bolted before we got up the stairs. I'm sure I'll see him around again."

"You really should stop trying to kidnap people like that. Just because he looked lonely doesn't mean that he's open to random men whisking him away.", remarked Yoongi, forever the realist.

"Well, yeah, but it worked with Hoseok, didn't it? There was just something about him, I couldn't help it."

"No, you just have a weakness for pretty, vulnerable boys. How many times do we have to go through this for you to realize that?"

Taehyung pouted. Maybe Yoongi was right, but there was no way you'd get him to admit that, not in a million years.

"Hey, speaking of Hobi, has anyone seen him? He hasn't been answering his phone for the past couple of days, and I'm starting to get worried." Jin asked, biting his lip and frowning.

"He'll turn up in a bit, he always does. Hey, do you mind getting me another cup of coffee? I have to work the dead shift tonight.", Namjoon looked up from the book he had been reading. Jin nodded and took the empty cup from him.

"Grab me one while you're at it." Taehyung flopped down in his favorite armchair, the one with all of the stuffing spilling out and the hideous floral print. Namjoon glanced over at him and smiled a little.

"Long day?"

"You could say that."

"We haven't spent much time together recently, have we? Ever since you started back at school, at least...We should hang out together, just the two of us." He stood up from where he was slouched on the sofa, striding across the room and squishing himself into the armchair with Taehyung. "Besides, you've been looking stressed lately. You know, I'm always here if you need to relieve some of that."

Taehyung flushed bright red, glancing around to make sure that neither Yoongi nor Jin had heard Namjoon's comment. Thankfully, Jin was still bustling around the kitchen and Yoongi was too preoccupied with whatever song he was working on to notice.

"I mean...I'm not saying no," Taehyung whispered back, trying to keep his face as neutral as possible.

"That's all that I needed to hear, babe," Namjoon smirked. Jin's footsteps echoed down the hall, and in sheer panic Taehyung shoved Namjoon from his seat half on his lap, where he fell to the ground with a thud.

"The fuck was that for?"

Taehyung was too preoccupied with staring at Jin, who had walked into the room at just the right (wrong?) time. Had he seen? Is he suspicious now?

"You know, I'm not going to ask what's been going on, mostly because I really don't care." Jin set the two mugs down on the crate that served as a coffee table. Inwardly, Taehyung sighed in relief.

Namjoon stood, brushing himself off.

"I've gotta go. My shift starts in a half hour." With one last questioning look, he left.

"I should head back home too. I have class in the morning." Taehyung jogged out the door and down the metal steps, crashing straight into him as he turned the corner.

"Do you like, just have something against me today?" Though Namjoon chuckled, his words were laced with an edge.

"Look, what are we doing? I mean, I know what we're doing, I guess. But what are we trying to accomplish? What am I supposed to make of this?", Tae pleaded.

Namjoon stared blankly back at him. For someone who was supposedly a genius, he really could be an idiot.

"I thought that this is what two people who are attracted to each other and who don't want commitment did. You know, they fuck but it doesn't mean anything. Or at least, it's not supposed to," Namjoon was quick to add the second bit, something that didn't escape Tae.

"Well, yeah, I get that..."

"Then what are you confused by?"

"When we're around Yoongi and Jin. Are we gonna let them pick up on it? Should we keep it hidden?"

"Fuck Tae, I don't know. Either way I don't care. Hell, they're right up there aren't they?" Namjoon grabbed Taehyung by the wrists, holding them above his head and shoving him against the wall. "Let them hear us, let them know. What're they going to say? I bet they've been fucking behind our backs too."

Taehyung whimpered slightly, his back arching into Namjoon. As much as he thought he wanted this, as hard as he was growing, something felt...off. When Namjoon went in for a kiss, he didn't duck away, but he didn't kiss him back either. It wasn't like he noticed, or at least he simply didn't care, because Namjoon had instead decided that he was going to shove his tongue halfway down Tae's throat.

He tasted slightly of soju, remnants of a drink or two earlier in the night. The familiar ashes and smoke scent surrounded Tae, and all he could think about was burying his head in the crook of Namjoon's neck, just so that he could drown himself in that smell.

As Taehyung pulled his hair, Namjoon shifted his focus from Tae's mouth down to his jaw, and then to his neck, settling on his collarbones and leaving what would inevitably be a huge hickey in the morning. Soft moans began to tumble from his lips, but when Namjoon reached down to palm him through his jeans he flinched.

It must've been more obvious than he had thought, because it was enough to make Namjoon (who was usually pretty oblivious once he was horny) back away.

"I didn't hurt you, did I? I can stop, it's okay."

"Yeah, that'd be...I'd like that."

Namjoon flushed under the pale yellow streetlight. "I didn't do anything...wrong did I?"

"No, no, it's just me. Can we just talk about this later?"

"But you were the one who wanted to talk about it in the first place. You know what, I don't care. I'm late." He shoved his hands in the front pockets of his jeans, turned, and left.

Taehyung sighed and slumped down to the sidewalk, his head buried in his hands. How could he explain himself to Namjoon when he can't even explain things to himself?